309. Simon Peter at Nazareth. 22nd October 1945. It is late in the morning when Peter, all alone and unexpected, arrives at the house in Nazareth. He is laden like a porter with baskets and little sacks. But he is so happy that he feels neither weight nor fatigue. He smiles blissfully at Mary, Who goes to open the door, and he greets Her with joy and veneration at the same time. He then asks: «Where are the Master and Marjiam?» «They are on the embankment, above the grotto, but towards Alphaeus' house. I think that Marjiam is picking olives and Jesus is certainly meditating. I will call them.» «I will see to that.» «Leave all your bundles first.» «No. They are a surprise for the boy. I like to see him open his eyes wide and rummage eagerly... It makes him so happy, poor boy.» He goes out into the kitchen garden, he goes under the embankment, he hides in the cavity of the grotto, and he then shouts, altering his voice a little: «Peace to You, Master», and then in his natural voice: «Marjiam!...» Marjiam's shrill voice, which filled the peaceful air with exclamations, becomes quiet... There is a pause, then the almost girlish voice of the boy asks: «Master, but was that not my father calling me?» Jesus was perhaps so engrossed in thought that He did not hear anything, and He openly admits it. Peter calls once again: «Marjiam!» and he laughs his usual hearty laugh. 309. Simon Peter at Nazareth. 106 «Oh! it is him! Father! Father! Where are you?» He leans out to look in the kitchen garden, but does not see anything... Jesus also comes forward and looks... He sees Mary Who is smiling on the doorstep and John and Syntyche who are also smiling from the room at the end of the kitchen garden near the stone-oven. But Marjiam comes to a decision: he jumps from the embankment, just near the grotto, and Peter is ready to catch him before he touches the ground. It is touching to see how they greet each other. Jesus, Mary and the two disciples at the end of the kitchen garden watch them, smiling, and then they all gather round the little fond group. Peter frees himself, as best he can, from the grip of the boy to bow to Jesus and greet Him once again. Jesus embraces him with the boy, who is still clinging to the apostle and asks: «And mother?» But Peter replies to Jesus Who asks him: «Why did you come so soon?» «Did You think I could stay away so long without seeing You? And then... Eh! then there is Porphirea who did not leave Me in peace: “Go and see Marjiam. Take him this. Take him that.” She seemed to think that Marjiam was among highwaymen or in a desert. The other night she got up just to make honey cakes and as soon as they were baked, she sent me off...» «Ah! honey cakes!...» shouts Marjiam. Then he becomes silent. «Yes. They are in here with figs dried in the oven, olives and red apples. And she baked an olive oil loaf for you. And she sent you some cheese made with the milk of your sheep. And there is also a water resistant tunic. And then, and then... I don't know what else there is. What? Are you no longer in a hurry? Are you weeping? Oh! Why?» «Because I would have preferred you to bring her here, instead of all these things... I am very fond of her, you know?» «Oh! Divine Mercy! Who would have thought that?! If she were here listening to you, she would melt like butter...» «Marjiam is right. You could have come with her. She certainly wishes to see him after such a long time. We women are just like that with our children...» says Mary. «Well... But she will see him before long, won't she, Master?» «Yes, after the Dedication, when we go away... No... When you come back, after the Dedication, you will come with her. She will stay here with him for a few days, and then they will go back to Bethsaida together.» «Oh! How lovely! I will be here with two mothers!» The boy is cheerful once again and happy. They all go into the house and Peter relieves himself of his bundles. «Here is some dried, pickled and fresh fish. It will be useful to Your Mother. And here is some of that cream cheese, which You like so much, Master. And here are some eggs for John. I hope they are not broken... No. Good. And some grapes. I got them from Susanna at Cana, where I slept. Then... Ah! Look at this Marjiam! Look how clear it is. It seems to be made with Mary's hair»... And he opens a jar of treacly honey. «Why so much stuff? You have gone to a lot of trouble, Simon» says Mary looking at the bundles, parcels, vases and jars on the table. «Trouble? No. I had a good haul and I made a good profit. That, as far as the fish is concerned. With regard to the rest: it is all home made. It costs nothing but gives so much joy to bring it. In any case... We are now at the Dedication... That is the custom. Isn't it? Are you not tasting the honey?» «I cannot» says Marjiam seriously. «Why? Are you not well?» «No. But I cannot take it.» «But why?» The boy blushes but does not reply. He looks at Jesus and is silent. Jesus smiles and explains: «Marjiam made a vow to obtain a grace. He cannot eat honey for four weeks.» «All right. You will eat it after... Take the jar just the same... Just imagine! I didn't think he was... so...» «So generous, Simon. He who becomes accustomed to penance from his childhood, will find the path of virtue easy throughout life» says Jesus, while the boy goes away with the jar in his hands. 309. Simon Peter at Nazareth. 107 Peter watches him go and is amazed. He then asks: «Is the Zealot not in?» «He has gone to Mary of Alphaeus. But he will soon be back. You will be sleeping together tonight. Come into the next room, Simon Peter.» They go out while Mary and Syntyche tidy up the room invaded by bundles. «Master... I have come to see You and the boy. That is true. But also because I have been thinking a lot these days, particularly after the arrival of three poisonous hornets... whom I told more lies than there are fish in the sea. They are now going to Gethsemane as they think that John of Endor is there and then they will be going to Lazarus, hoping to find Syntyche and You there. Let them walk!... But they will come back and... Master, they want to cause You trouble because of those two wretched people...» «I made all the necessary arrangements months ago. When they come back looking for these two persecuted people, they will not find them anywhere in Palestine. See these chests? I made them for John and Syntyche. Did you notice all those folded garments near the loom? They are for them. Are you surprised?» «Yes, Master. Where are You sending them?» «To Antioch.» Peter whistles meaningfully and then asks: «To whom? And how will they go there?» «To a house belonging to Lazarus. The last one Lazarus has where his father governed in the name of Rome. And they will go by sea...» «Ah! I see! Because if John had to go there on foot...» «By sea. I am glad I can speak to you about it. I was going to send Simon to say to you: “Come”, to prepare everything. Listen. Two or three days after the Feast of the Dedication we will leave from here few at a time, in order not to attract anybody's attention. The group will be formed by Me, you, your brother, James and John, My two cousins, John and Syntyche. We will go to Ptolemais! From there you will take them by boat to Tyre. There you will board a ship sailing to Antioch, as if you were proselytes going back home. You will then come back and you will find Me at Achzib. I will be on the mountain top every day. In any case the Spirit will guide you...» «What? Are You not coming with us?» «I would be noted too much. I want to give peace to John's soul.» «And what will I do since I have never been away from here?» «You are not a child... and soon you will have to go much farther than Antioch. I trust you. You can see that I esteem you very much...» «And what about Philip and Bartholomew?» «They will come and meet us at Jotopata and will evangelize while waiting for us. I will write to them and you will take the letter.» «And... those two over there, do they already know their destiny?» «No. I want them to celebrate the Feast in peace...» «H'm. Poor people... Fancy that! People are persecuted by criminals and...» «Do not foul your mouth, Simon.» «No, Master... Listen... How will we carry these chests? And John? He looks seriously ill to me.» «We will take a donkey.» «No. We will take a cart.» «And who will drive it?» «Eh! If Judas of Simon learned to row, Simon of Jonah will learn to drive a cart. It should not be difficult to lead a donkey by the bridle. We will put the chests and those two in the cart... and we will go on foot. Yes, it is better to do that, believe me.» «And who will give us the cart? Remember that I do not want our departure to be noted.» Peter thinks... He makes up his mind: «Have You any money?» «Yes. Still quite a lot of the money we got for Misace's jewels.» «In that case it is easy. Give me a sum. I will get a donkey and cart from someone and... yes... we will make a present of the donkey to some poor wretch and the cart... we will see... I am glad I came. And must I really come back with my wife?» «Yes. It is better.» «Good. But those two poor wretches! I am sorry that we shall no longer have 309. Simon Peter at Nazareth. 108 John with us. True, we would not have had him for long... But, poor man! He might have died here, like Jonah...» «They would not have allowed him. The world hates those who redeem themselves.» «He will feel humiliated...» «I will find a reason to make him leave with − a relieved mind.» «Which reason?» «The same as I used to send away Judas of Simon: to work for Me.» «Ah!... The difference is that in John it will be holiness, whereas in Judas it is only pride.» «Simon, do not backbite.» «That is more difficult than to make a fish sing! It is the truth, Master, it is not backbiting... But I think that Simon has come with Your brothers. Let us go...» «Let us go. Not a word to anybody.» «Are You telling me? I cannot omit mentioning the truth when I speak, but I can be silent, if I want. And I do want! I swore it to myself. Imagine me going to Antioch! To the ends of the earth! Oh! I wish I were already back! I shall sleep no more until it is all over...» They go out and I see no more. 310. Jesus Speaks about the Holy Economy of Universal Love. 23rd October 1945. I do not know whether it is the same day, but I suppose it is, because Peter is sitting at the family table in Nazareth. The meal is almost over and Syntyche gets up to put on the table some apples, nuts, grapes and almonds which end the supper, because it is evening and lamps have already been lit. They are talking about lamps when Syntyche brings the fruit. Peter says: «This year we will light an extra lamp, and then more and more, for you, son. Because we want to light it for you, even if you are here. It is the first time we light one for a boy...» and Simon is moved when he ends: «It would certainly be lovelier, if you were there...» «Last year, Simon, it was I who sighed for My Son far away, and with Me, Mary of Alphaeus, Salome and also Mary of Simon in her house at Kerioth, and Thomas' mother...» «Oh! Judas' mother! Her son will be with her this year... but I do not think she will be happier... Never mind... We were at Lazarus'. How many lights!... It looked like a sky of gold and fire. Lazarus has his sister this year... But I am sure of speaking the truth when I say that they will be sighing because You are not there. And where will we be next year?» «I will be very far away...» whispers John. Peter turns round to look at him, as he is sitting beside John, and he is on the point of asking something, but fortunately he controls himself, because of a meaningful look of Jesus. Marjiam asks: «Where will you be?» «By the mercy of the Lord I hope to be in Abraham's bosom...» «Oh! do you want to die? Do you not want to evangelize? Are you not sorry to die before evangelizing?» «The word of the Lord is to be announced by holy lips. It is a great favour if He allowed me to hear it and redeem myself through it. I would have liked... But it is late...» «And yet you will evangelize. You have already done so. So much so that you have attracted people's attention. You will therefore be called just the same an evangelizing disciple, even if you do not travel about preaching the Gospel; and in the next life you will receive the prize reserved for My evangelizers.» «Your promise makes me desire death... Every minute in life may conceal a snare, and weak as I am, I may not be able to overcome it. If God receives me, being satisfied with what I have done, is that not great bounty, which I must bless?» «I solemnly tell you that death will be supreme bounty for many, who will thus know to what extent man raves, from a place where peace will comfort them for such knowledge, and will change it into hosanna because it will be linked to the unutterable joy of liberation from Limbo.» «And where shall we be in future years, Lord?» asks Simon Zealot who has been listening diligently. «Where it will please the Eternal Father. Do you want to engage the remote future, when we are not certain of the moment in which we live and whether we will be granted to end it? In any case, whatever the place where the future Dedications will be celebrated, it will always be a holy one provided you are there to fulfill the will of God.» «Provided we are? And what about You?» asks Peter. «I will always be where My beloved ones are.» Mary has never spoken, but Her eyes have not ceased for one moment to scan the face of Her Son... She is roused by Marjiam's remark who says: «Mother, why have You not put the honey cakes on the table? Jesus likes them and they are good for John's throat. And my father likes them, too...» «And you, too» concludes Peter. «As far as I am concerned... they do not exist. I promised...» «That is why I did not put them on the table, My dear...» says Mary caressing him, because Marjiam is between Her and Syntyche, on one side of the table, while the four men are on the opposite side. «No, no. You can bring them. Nay: You must bring them. And I will hand them out to everybody.» Syntyche takes a lamp, goes out and comes back with the cakes. Marjiam takes the tray and begins to hand them out. He gives Jesus the most beautiful one, golden and raised like one made by a master confectioner. The next one in perfection is for Mary. Then it is the turn of Peter, Simon and Syntyche. But in order to serve John, the boy gets up and goes beside the old sick teacher and says to him: «I am giving you yours and mine, with a kiss, to thank you for what you teach me.» He then goes back to his place, lays the tray in the middle of the table resolutely and folds his arms. «You make this delicious cake go the wrong way» says Peter, when he sees that Marjiam does not take any. And he adds: «At least a little bit. Here, take some of mine, so that you will not die to have some. You are suffering too much... Jesus will let you have it.» «But if I did not suffer, I would have no merit, father. I offered this sacrifice exactly because I knew that it would make me suffer. After all... I have been so happy since I made it, that I seem to be full of honey. I taste it in everything, and I even seem to breathe it in the air...» «That's because you are dying to have some...» «No. It's because I know that God says to me: “You are doing the right thing, My son.”» «The Master would have satisfied you, even without this sacrifice. He loves you so much!» «Yes. But it is not fair that I should take advantage of it, just because He loves me. In any case, He says that great is the reward in Heaven even for a cup of water offered in His name. I think that if it is great for a cup of water given to other people in His name, it must be great also for a cake or a little honey which one gives up out of love for a brother. Am I wrong, Master?» «No, you have spoken wisely. In fact, I could have granted you what you asked for in favour of little Rachel, also without your sacrifice, because it was a good thing to do and My Heart desired it. But I did it with greater joy because I was helped by you. The love for our brothers is not confined to human means and limits, but it rises to much higher levels. When it is perfect, it really touches the throne of God and blends with His infinite Charity and Bounty. The communion of saints is just this continuous activity, as God works continuously and in every way, to assist our brothers both in their material and spiritual needs, or in both, as it is in the case of Marjiam, who relieves Rachel of her illness, by obtaining her cure, and at the same time he relieves the dejected spirit of old Johanna and kindles greater and greater trust in the Lord in all the hearts in the family. Even a spoonful of honey, offered as a sacrifice, can help to bring peace and hope to an afflicted soul; as a cake or any other food given up out of love, may obtain some bread, offered miraculously, for some starving person, who is remote from us and will never be known to us; and an angry word not uttered, out of spirit of sacrifice, although justified, may prevent a remote crime; as to resist the desire to pick a fruit, out of love, may bring about a thought of resipiscence in a thief 310.Jesus Speaks about the Holy Economy of Universal Love. 110 and thwart a theft. Nothing is lost in the holy economy of universal love: neither the heroic sacrifice of a boy before a dish of honey cakes, nor the holocaust of a martyr. Nay, I tell you that the holocaust of a martyr often originates from the heroic upbreeding imparted to him since his childhood for the love of God and his neighbour.» «So it is really a good thing that I should always make sacrifices. For the time when we will be persecuted» says Marjiam earnestly. «Persecuted?» asks Peter. «Yes. Don't you remember that He said so? “You will be persecuted in My name.” You told me, the first time you came all alone to Bethsaida, in summer, to evangelize.» «This boy remembers everything» comments Peter admiring him. The supper is over. Jesus stands up. He prays for everybody and blesses them. And while the women go to tidy up the kitchen, Jesus and the men take seats in a corner of the room, where He begins to carve a piece of wood, which under the amazed eyes of Marjiam, takes the shape of a little sheep.
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