81. At the Jordan Ford. Meeting with the Shepherds John, Matthias and Simeon.

 81. At the Jordan Ford. Meeting with the Shepherds John, Matthias and Simeon. 18th January 1945. I see the Jordan ford once again: the green road coasting the river on both banks, beaten by many travellers on account of its `lade. Lines of little donkeys come and go, as well as many people. On the bank of the river, three men are pasturing a few sheep. Joseph is on the road, waiting, and he looks up and down. Jesus appears in the distance, with His three disciples, at the junction of the river path with the main road. Joseph calls the shepherds, who lead the sheep on to the road, driving them along the grassy bank. They walk fast towards Jesus. « I haven't got the courage… What shall I say to greet Him? » « Oh! He is so good! Say: “Peace be with You.” He always says that. » « Yes, He… but we… » « And what about me? I am not even one of His first worshippers, and He is so fond of me… oh! so fond! » « Which one is it? » « The tallest One, with fair hair. » « Matthias, will we tell Him of the Baptist? » 81.At the Jordan Ford. Meeting with the Shepherds John, Matthias and Simeon. 259 « Of course we will! » « Will He not think that we preferred the Baptist to Him? » « No, Simeon. If He is the Messiah, He can see into the hearts of men, and in ours He will see that in the Baptist we were still looking for Him. » « Yes, you are right. » The two groups are now a few yards apart. Jesus is already smiling His indescribable smile. Joseph hastens his step. Also the sheep begin to run urged by the herdsmen. « Peace be with you » says Jesus raising His arms as if He were embracing them. And He specifies: « Peace to you, Simeon, John and Matthias, faithful to Me, and faithful to John the Prophet! Peace to you, Joseph » and He kisses him on his cheeks. The other three are now on their knees. « Come, My friends. Under these trees, on the exposed river-bed and let us talk. » They go down and Jesus sits on a large protruding root, the others on the ground. Jesus smiles and looks at them intently, one by one: « Let Me become familiar with your faces. Your souls are already known to Me, souls that seek and love what is good contrary to all worldly yearnings. Isaac, Elias and Levi send you their regards, and there are other greetings, from My Mother. Have You any news of the Baptist? » The men, so far gagged by embarrassment, take heart. They find words at last: « He is still in jail. Our hearts tremble for him, because he is in the hands of a cruel man who is dominated by an infernal creature and is surrounded by a corrupted court. We love him… You know that we love him and that he deserves our love. After you left Bethlehem, we were persecuted by men… but we were distressed and disheartened because we had lost You, rather than by their hatred, and we were like trees uprooted by the wind. Then, after years of suffering, like a man, whose eyelashes have been stitched, endeavors to see the sun, but cannot, also because he is closed in a prison, but feels the warmth of the sun on his body, we felt that the Baptist was the man of God, foreseen by the Prophets to prepare the way to His Christ and we went to him. We said: “If the Baptist precedes Him, if we go to the Baptist, we will find Him.” Because, my Lord, it was You we were looking for. » « I know, and you found Me. And now I am with you. » « Joseph told us that You came to the Baptist. But we were not there that day. Perhaps he had sent us somewhere. We serve him, in spiritual matters, when he asked us, with so much love, and we listened to him with love, although he was so severe, because he was not You – the Word – but he always spoke words of God. » « I know. And do you know this man? » and He points to John. « We saw him with the other Galileans in the crowds which were most faithful to the Baptist. And, if we are not mistaken, you are the one whose name is John, and of whom he used to say to us, his closest disciples: “Here: I am the first, he is the last. And then: he will be the first and I the last.” But we never understood what he meant. » Jesus turns round to His left side where John is and He draws him against His heart and with a most kind smile He explains: « He meant that he was the first to say: “Here is the Lamb” and that John here will be the last of the friends of the Son of man, to speak of the Lamb to the crowds; but that in the heart of the Lamb, John is the first, because he is dearer than any other man to the Lamb. That is what he meant. But when you see the Baptist – You will see him again, and you will serve him again until the predetermined hour – tell him that he is not the last in Christ's heart. Not so much because of the blood, as on account of his holiness, he is loved as much as John. And remember that. If the saint in his humility proclaims himself “last”, the Word of God proclaims him equal to the disciple who is dear to Me.. Tell him that I love this disciple because he has the same name and because I find in him the signs of the Baptist, who prepares the souls for Christ. » « We will tell him… But will we see him again? » « Yes, you will. » « Yes, Herod dare not kill him for fear of the people and at his court, which is full of greed and corruption, it would be easy to free him if we had a lot of money. But, although there is quite a lot – because friends have given a lot – there is still a lot missing. And we are afraid we will not be in time… and he may be killed. » « How much do you think you need for the ransom? » 81.At the Jordan Ford. Meeting with the Shepherds John, Matthias and Simeon. 260 « Not for his ransom, Lord. He is hated too much by Herodias and she has too much control of Herod, to think of the possibility of a ransom. But I think that all the greedy people of the kingdom have gathered at Machaerus. Everybody is anxious to have a good time and stand out, from the ministers down to the servants. And to do that, they need money… We have also found who would let the Baptist out for a large sum of money. Perhaps also Herod would prefer that… because he is afraid. Not for any other reason. He is afraid of the people and afraid of his wife. In that way, he could please the people, and his wife could not accuse him of disappointing her. » « And how much does that person want? » « Twenty silver talents. But we have only twelve and a half. » « Judas, you said that those jewels are beautiful. » « Yes, beautiful and valuable. » « How much will they be worth? I think you are an expert. » « Yes, I am a good judge. Why do You want to know how much they are worth, Master? Do You want to sell them? Why? » « Perhaps… Tell Me: how much will they be worth? » « At least six talents, if they are sold well. » « Are you sure? » « Yes, Master. The necklace by itself, so big and heavy, of the purest gold, is worth at least three talents. I have examined it carefully. And also the bracelets… I don't know how Aglae's thin wrists could hold them. » « They were her shackles, Judas. » « That's true, Master… But so many would like to have such beautiful shackles! » « Do you think so? Who? » « Well… many people! » « Yes, many who are human beings only by name… And do you know a possible buyer? » « So, do You want to sell them? And is it for the Baptist? But look, it's cursed gold! » « Oh! Human inconsistency! You have just said with evident desire, that many people would love to have that gold, and then you say it is cursed?! Judas, Judas!… It is cursed, indeed. But she said: “It will be sanctified if it is used for poor and holy people” and that is why she gave it, that who benefits by it, may pray for her poor soul that like the embryo of a future butterfly swells in the seed of her heart. Who is holier and poorer than the Baptist? He is equal to Elijah in his mission but greater than Elijah in holiness. He is poorer than I am. I have a Mother and a home… And when one has such things, and pure and holy as I have, one is never forlorn. He no longer has a home, and he has not got even the tomb of his mother. Everything has been violated and desecrated by human iniquity. So who is the buyer? » « There is one in Jericho and there are many in Jerusalem. But the one in Jericho!!! He is a shrewd Levantine gold-beater, a usurer, a middleman, a pander, he is certainly a thief, probably a killer, he is definitely persecuted by Rome. He has changed his name to Isaac, to be considered a Hebrew… But his real name is Diomedes. I know him very well… » « Yes, we see that! » intervenes Simon Zealot, who speaks little, but notices everything. And he asks: « How come you know him so well? » « Well… you know… In order to please certain mighty friends. I went to see him… and did some business… You know… we of the Temple… » « I know… you do all sorts of jobs » Simon ends with cold irony. Judas flares up, but keeps silent. « Will he buy? » asks Jesus. « I think so. He has plenty money. Of course, one must be skilful in selling because the Greek is shrewd and if he realizes he is dealing with an honest person, with a nestling dove, he plucks him mercilessly. But if he has to deal with a vulture like himself… » 81.At the Jordan Ford. Meeting with the Shepherds John, Matthias and Simeon. 261 « You ought to go, Judas. You are the right man. You are as sly as a fox and as raptorial as a vulture. Oh! Forgive me, Master. I spoke before You! » says Simon Zealot again. « I am of the same opinion, and I will therefore tell Judas to go. John, you will go with him. We will meet again at sunset, and the meeting place will be the market square. Go. And do your best. » Judas gets up at once. John's eyes are imploring like a chastened puppy's. But Jesus is speaking to the shepherds and does not notice John's imploring look. And John sets out behind Judas. « I would like to see you happy » says Jesus. « You will always make us happy, Master. May God bless You for it. Is that man a friend of Yours? » « Yes, he is. Do you think he should not be? » The shepherd John lowers his head, and keeps silent. Simon, the disciple, speaks: « Only who is good, can, see. I am not good, and therefore I do not see what Bounty sees. I see the exterior. Who is good penetrates also into the interior. You, John, see as I do. But the Master is good… and sees… » « What do you see in Judas, Simon? I want you to tell Me. » « Well, when I look at him, I think of certain mysterious places which look like dens of wild beasts and malarial ponds. Only a huge tangle can be seen and one is frightened, and keeps clear… Instead… behind it there are turtle-doves and nightingales and the soil is rich in healthy waters and beneficial herbs. I want to believe that Judas is like that… I think he must be, because You chose him. And You know… » « Yes, I know… There are many flaws in the heart of that man… But he has some good points. You saw that yourself in Bethlehem and in Kerioth. And his good points which are humanly good are to be raised to a spiritual goodness. Judas will then be as you would like him to be. He is young… » « Also John is young… » « And in your heart, you conclude that he is better. But John is John! Love poor Judas, Simon, I beg you.. If you love him… he will appear to be better. » « I endeavor to love him, for Your sake. But he breaks all my efforts as if they were water canes… But, Master, there is only one law for me: to do what You want. I will therefore love Judas, although something within me shouts against him and towards myself. » « What, Simon? » « I do not know exactly what it is: something that resembles the cry of the night watchman… and says to me: “Do not sleep! Watch!” I do not know. That something has no name. But it is here… in me, against him. » « Forget about it, Simon. Do not trouble to give it a definition. It is better not to know certain truths… and you might be mistaken. Leave it to your Master. Give Me your love, and you can be sure that it makes Me happy… » And it all ends

80. Jesus Returns to the Mountain Where He Fasted and to the Rock of Temptation.

 80. Jesus Returns to the Mountain Where He Fasted and to the Rock of Temptation. 17th January 1945. A most beautiful dawn in the wilderness, seen from the height of a mountain side. It is daybreak. A few stars are still visible and a very thin arc of a waning moon looks like a silver comma on the dark blue velvet of the sky. The mountain is completely isolated, that is, it is not linked to any other chain of mountains. But it is a real mountain, not a hill. The top is much higher up, but even from the middle of its slope one commands a very wide horizon, because one is well above ground level. In the fresh morning air, as the faint whitegreenish dawn light becomes clearer and clearer, profiles and details slowly become visible, whereas before they were hidden in the fog that precedes daybreak, a fog that is darker than night, because the light of the stars seems to diminish and fade away in the transition from night to day. I thus see that the mountain is rocky and barren, split by gorges forming grottoes, caves and inlets in its side. It is a real wilderness: only where there is some earth capable of receiving and retaining the moisture of the rain, are there a few green tufts, mainly stiff thorny plants, with very few leaves, and low hard bushes of grass similar to thin green sticks, the name of which I do not know. Below there is an even more barren plain, a flat stony ground that becomes more arid as it stretches out towards a dark spot, much longer than wider, at least five times longer than wider, which I think must be a dense oasis, which has sprung up in so much bleakness, because of underground waters. But when the light becomes brighter, I see that it is nothing but water. Stagnant, dark, dead water. A lake of infinite sadness. In the still feeble light it reminds me of the vision of the dead world. It seems to be drawing to itself all the darkness of the sky and all the gloominess of the surrounding area, dissolving in its still water the deep green of the thorny shrubs and stiff grass that for miles and miles around it and above it, are the only decoration of the earth. And after filtering so much gloom it seems to spread it around once again. How different it is from the sunny, smiling lake of Gennesaret! High above, looking at the clear blue sky, which is becoming clearer and clearer, looking at the light progressing from the east in deeper and deeper brightness, one's soul rejoices. But looking at the huge, dead lake, gives one a stab in the heart. Not one bird flies over the water. Not one animal is on its shore. Nothing. While I am watching so much desolation, I am roused by the voice of my Jesus: « Here we are at the place I wanted. » I turn round. I see Him behind me, with John, Simon and Judas, near the rocky slope of the mountain, where there is a little path, or rather, where the long erosion of waters, in the rainy months, has formed throughout centuries, a very shallow channel, a drain for the water flowing from the mountain top and which is a path for wild goats rather than for 80.Jesus Returns to the Mountain Where He Fasted and to the Rock of Temptation. 254 men. Jesus looks around and repeats: « Yes, this is the place to which I wanted to bring you. Here Christ prepared for His mission. » « But there is nothing here! » « You are quite right, there is nothing. » « With whom were You? » « With My soul and with the Father. » « Ah! You stayed only for a few hours! » « No, Judas. Not a few hours. Many days… » « But who served You? Where did You sleep? » « My servants were the wild asses that came to sleep in their caves, where I also had taken shelter. My maidservants were the eagles that said to Me with their harsh cries: “It's daylight” and they flew away to attack their prey. My friends were the little hares that came up almost to My feet, gnawing at the wild herbs. My food and My drink were the same food and drink of the wild flower: the night dew and the sunshine. Nothing else. » « But why? » « To prepare well, as you say, for My mission. Things well prepared for are successful. You said so yourself. And My thing was not a trifle, a useless thing which would glorify Me, the Servant of the Lord, but it was to make men understand what the Lord is, and by means of such understanding, make Him loved in the spirit of truth. The servant that is concerned with his own triumph, and not with the Lord's, is a miserable man! The servant who is anxious to make a profit, who dreams he will sit on a high throne built on the interests of God, which have been lowered down to the earth, whereas they are celestial interests, is also a miserable servant. He is no longer a servant, except in outer appearance. He is a merchant, a trafficker, a deceitful person, who deceives himself and men and would like to deceive also God… a wretched man who believes he is a prince, whilst he is a slave. He belongs to the Evil One, his king of falsehood. Here, in this cave, Christ for many days lived fasting and praying to get ready for His mission. And where would you have suggested I should have gone to prepare, Judas? » Judas is puzzled and bewildered. Eventually he replies: « I would not know… I was thinking… to a rabbi… or with the Essenes… I do not know. » « And was it possible for Me to find a rabbi who would tell Me more than the power and wisdom of God were telling Me? And could I – I the Eternal Word of the Father, Who was present when the Father created man and am aware of the immortal soul by which he is animated and of the power of free capable judgement with which he was endowed by the Creator – would I have gone to derive science and skill from those who deny the immortality of souls, final resurrection and also the freedom of man to act, attributing virtues and vices, holy and wicked deeds to a destiny, which they say is fated and uncontrollable? Certainly not! You have a destiny. In the mind of God Who creates you, there is a destiny for you. It is the wish of the Father. And it is a destiny of love, of peace, of glory: “the holiness of being His children.” That is the destiny that was present in the divine mind when Adam was fashioned with dust and will be present until the creation of the last soul of man. But the Father does not denigrate you in your position of kings. If a king is a prisoner, he is no longer a king: he is an outcast. You are kings because you are free in your small individual kingdoms. In your “ego”. You can do what you like and how you like. Before you and on the boundaries of your small kingdom you have a friendly King and two enemy powers. The Friend shows you the rules that He gives to make His followers happy. He shows them and says: “Here they are. With them, your eternal victory is certain.” He, The Wise and Holy One, shows them to you so that you may put them into practice, if you want to, and thus receive eternal glory. The two enemy powers are Satan and the flesh. By flesh I mean your flesh and the world: they are, the pomps and enticements of the world, that is, the riches, feasts, honors and powers which are obtained from the world and in the world, but are not always obtained honestly and they are used even less honestly when eventually a man reaches them. Satan, the master of the flesh and of the world, speaks also on behalf of the world and of the flesh. He, too, has his rules… Oh! He certainly has! And as your “ego” is enveloped in the flesh, and the flesh is attracted by the flesh, as metal chips are attracted by a magnet, and the singing of the Seducer is sweeter than the warble of a nightingale in love in the moon- 80.Jesus Returns to the Mountain Where He Fasted and to the Rock of Temptation. 255 light and among perfumed rose bushes, it is easier to follow those rules, and incline towards those powers and say to them: “I consider you my friends. Come in.” Come in… Have you ever seen an ally who remains honest forever, without asking a hundredfold return for the help he has given? That is what those powers do. They go in… And they become the masters. Masters? No: galley sergeants. They tie you, men, to the galley bench, they fasten you with chains, they do not allow you to raise your head from their yoke, and their lash leaves bleeding marks on your backs if you attempt to escape. You either must bear to be torn to pieces and become a heap of shattered flesh, so useless, as flesh, as to be rejected and kicked aside by their cruel feet, or you must die under their blows. If you can bear that martyrdom, then Mercy will come, the Only One who can still have mercy on that revolting misery, which the world, one of the masters, now loathes and at which the other master, Satan, throws the arrows of his revenge. And Mercy, the Only One, passes by, bends down, picks it up, doctors it, cures it and says: “Come. Do not be afraid. Do not look at yourself. Your wounds are but scars, but they are so numerous that you would be horrified, as they disfigure you. But I do not look at them. I look at your good will. Because of your good will, you are marked. Therefore I say to you: I love you. Come with Me.” And He takes it to His Country. You then understand that Mercy and the friendly King are the same person. You find the rules He had shown to you and you did not want to follow. Now you want them… and first you reach the peace of your conscience, then the peace of God. Tell Me, now. Was that destiny imposed by the Only One on everybody, or did each choose it for himself? » « It was chosen by each person. » « You are right, Simon. Was it possible for Me to go to those who deny the blessed resurrection and the gift of God, to be taught? I came here. I took My soul of the Son of man and I gave it its finishing touches and I thus finished the work of thirty years of humility and preparation in order to be perfect when starting My mission. Now I ask you to stay with Me for a few days in this cave. Our stay will be less depressing because we shall be four friends joining in our efforts against sadness, fears, temptation and the desires of the flesh. I was by Myself. It will be less painful, because it is now summer and up here, the mountain winds lessen the heat. I came here at the end of the Tebeth moon and the wind blowing down from the snowy tops was harsh. It will be less trying because it will be shorter and also because we have the necessary food to satisfy our hunger and in small leather flasks that I asked the shepherds to give you, there is enough water to last us for the days of our stay. I… I must snatch two souls from Satan. It can only be done by penance. I ask you to help Me. It will be a training for you. You will learn how to snatch victims from Mammon: not so much with words as with sacrifice… Words!… The satanic uproar prevents one from hearing them… Every soul which is a prey of the Enemy is enveloped in an eddy of infernal voices… Do you want to stay with Me? If you do not want to, you may go and we will meet at Tekoah, near the market. » « No, Master, I will not leave You » says John, while Simon at the same time exclaims: « You extol us by wanting us to be with You in this redemption. » Judas… does not appear to be terribly enthusiastic. But he puts a good face on… destiny and says: « I will stay. » « Well, take the flasks and the bags and put them inside, and before the sun gets hot, break some wood and gather it near the crevice. The nights are severe, even in summer, and not all the animals are gentle. Light a branch at once. Over there, a branch of that gummy acacia. It burns very well. We will search in the crevices and with the fire we will drive out asps and scorpions. Go. »… --------------- … The same spot on the mountain. But it is night now. A starry night. I think that the beauty of such a nocturnal sky can be enjoyed only in such almosttropical countries. The stars are wonderfully large and bright. The bigger constellations seem clusters of diamond chips, of clear topazes, of pale sapphires, of mild opals and soft rubies. They tremble, they light up, they go out like glances hidden for an instant by eyelashes, and light up again more beautiful than before. Now and again a star swoops across the sky and I wonder to where it disappears. A streak of light that seems a jubilant cry of a star capable of flying over wide landscapes. Jesus is sitting at the entrance of the cave and is speaking to the three disciples who are sat in a circle round Him. They must have lit a fire, because in the middle of them, some brands are still as bright as embers and they cast their ruddy glow on the four faces. « Yes. Our stay is over. The last time it lasted forty days… And I would repeat that it was still winter up here… and I had no food. A little more difficult than this time, was it not? I know that you have suffered even now. The little food we 80.Jesus Returns to the Mountain Where He Fasted and to the Rock of Temptation. 256 had and I gave you was nothing, particularly for hungry young people. It was barely sufficient to prevent you from collapsing. And the water even less so. The heat is intense during the day. And you will say that it was not so in winter. But then there was a dry wind blowing from that mountain top and it parched My lungs, and it rose from the plain loaded with desert dust and it dried more than this summer heat which can be assuaged by sucking the juice of those acidulous fruits that are almost ripe. The mountain in winter gave only wind and frostbitten herbs near bare acacias. I did not give you everything because I kept the last bread and cheese and the last flask of water for our way back… I know what My return journey was like, exhausted as I was in the desert solitude… Let us pick up our things and go. Tonight is even clearer than the night we came here. There is no moon. But light is pouring from the sky. Let us go. Remember this place. Remember how Christ prepared and how the apostles prepare. Let the apostles prepare as I teach them. » They get up. Simon stirs the embers with a stick, and before scattering them with his foot, he rekindles the fire throwing some dry herbs on it, and from the flame he lights a branch of acacia and holds it up at the entrance of the cave, while Judas and John pick up mantles, bags and small leather flasks of which only one is still full. He then puts the branch out, rubbing it against the rock, he takes his satchel, puts on his mantle like all the rest, and ties it at his waist so that it may not hinder him in walking. Without speaking, one behind the other, they go down a very steep path, putting to flight small animals grazing on the scanty grass not yet parched by the sun. It is a long and uncomfortable journey. At last they reach the plain. It is not easy to walk even there, where stones and stone splinters undermine their feet, sliding under them and hurting them also, because the thick dust of the path conceals them and it is therefore impossible to avoid them. Further, naked thorny bushes scratch them and catch the lower part of their garments. But they can walk faster. High above, the stars are lovelier and lovelier. They walk and walk for hours. The plain is more and more barren and depressing. Little scales sparkle in small crevices and holes of the ground. They look like dirty scales of diamond chips. John bends down to look at them. « It is the salt of the subsoil which is saturated with them. It comes to the surface with the spring waters and then dries up. That is why life is impossible here. The Eastern Sea spreads its death for many miles around, through deep veins in the ground. Only where fresh spring waters counteract its effects, is it possible to find plants and ease » explains Jesus. They go on walking. Jesus stops at the hollow rock where I saw Him tempted by Satan. « Let us stop here. Sit down. It will soon be daybreak. We have walked for six hours and you must be hungry, thirsty and tired. Take this. Eat and drink, sitting here, near Me, while I tell you something that you will repeat to your friends and to the world. » Jesus has opened His satchel and has pulled out bread and cheese, which He cuts and hands out, and from His flask He pours out some water into a small jug which He hands round, too. « Are You not eating, Master? » « No, I will speak to you. Listen. Once a man asked Me whether I had ever been tempted. He asked Me whether I had ever committed sin, and whether, when tempted, I had ever given in. And he was surprised because, in order to resist temptation, I, the Messiah, had asked the Father for help, saying: “Father, lead Me not into temptation.”» Jesus speaks slowly, calmly as if He were relating an event with which none of them was acquainted… Judas lowers his head as if he were embarrassed. But the others are so intent on looking at Jesus, that they do not notice him. Jesus goes on: « Now, My friends, you will learn something of which that man had only a faint idea. After My Baptism I came here: I was clean, but one is never clean enough with regard to God, and the humility in saying: “I am a man and a sinner” is already a baptism which makes the heart clean. I had been called “the Lamb of God” by the holy prophet who saw the Truth and saw the Spirit descend upon the Word and anoint Him with its chrism of love, while the voice of the Father filled the Heavens saying: “This is My beloved Son in Whom I am well pleased.” You, John, were present when the Baptist repeated those words… After being baptized, although I was clean both by My nature and by appearance, I wanted to “prepare”. Yes, Judas. Look at Me. May My eyes tell you what My mouth does not yet speak. Look at Me, Judas. Look at your Master, Who although was the Messiah, did not consider Himself superior to man, on the contrary, knowing He was the Man, He wanted to be so in everything, except in yielding to evil. Exactly so. » Judas has now raised his head and looks at Jesus in front of him. The light of the stars causes Jesus' eyes to sparkle as if they were two stars fixed in a pale face. 80.Jesus Returns to the Mountain Where He Fasted and to the Rock of Temptation. 257 « If one wants to prepare to be a teacher one must have been a pupil. I, as God, knew everything. My intelligence enabled Me to understand also the struggles of man, both by intellectual power and in an intellectual way, that is without any practical experience. But then some poor friend of Mine, some poor son of Mine, could have said to Me: “You do not know what it is to be a man and have senses and passions.” And it would have been a fair reproach. I came here, or rather on that mountain, to prepare… not only for My mission… but also for temptation. See? I was tempted where you are now sitting. By whom? By a mortal being? No. His power would have been too limited. I was tempted by Satan himself. I was exhausted. I had not eaten for forty days… But while I was engrossed in prayer, everything had been forgotten in the joy of speaking to God, rather than forgotten, it had been made endurable. I felt it as a discomfort of a material nature, confined to matter only… I then came back to the world… I was back in the ways of the world… And I felt the needs of those who are in the world. I was hungry. I was thirsty. I felt the biting cold of the desert night. My body was worn out with lack of rest, of a bed and with a long journey made in such a state of weariness that I could go no farther… Because I am made of flesh too, My dear friends. Real flesh. And my flesh is subject to the weakness common to all the flesh. And, with My flesh, I have a heart. Yes, I took the first and second of the three parts that form man. I took the physical part with all its needs and the morals with their passions. And whilst, with My will, I subdued all the bad passions at birth, I let the holy passions grow like mighty age-old cedars, that is filial love, love for the fatherland, friendship, work, everything that is best and holy. And here I felt nostalgia for My far away Mother, here I felt the need of Her care for My human frailty, here I felt once again the pain of parting from the Only One Who loved Me with perfect love, here I realized what sorrow is laid aside for Me and I was grieved at Her sorrows, poor Mother, Who will have to shed so many tears for Her Son and because of the wickedness of men, that She will be left tearless. And here I experienced the weariness of the hero and of the ascetic who in an hour of forewarning realize the uselessness of their efforts… I cried… Sadness… a lure for Satan. It is not a sin to be sad in painful circumstances. It is a sin to go beyond sadness and fall into inertness and despair. But Satan comes at once when he sees anyone in spiritual languor. He came. Dressed as a kind traveller. He always takes a kind appearance… I was hungry… and thirty years old. He offered to help Me. First he said to Me: “Tell these stones to become bread.” But before… yes… even before, he spoke to Me about woman. Oh! He knows how to speak of her. He knows her very well. He corrupted her first, to make her his ally in corruption. I am not only the Son of God. I am Jesus, the workman of Nazareth. I said to that man, who was speaking to Me then, the one who asked Me whether I had experienced temptations and almost accused Me for being unjustly blessed, because I had not sinned: “The act subsides when satisfied. A rejected temptation does not fade away, but becomes stronger also because Satan instigates it.” I resisted the temptation both of lust of woman and hunger for bread. And you must know that Satan proposed woman to Me as the best ally to succeed in the world, and he was quite right, from a human point of view. Temptation did not give up because of My remark: “Man does not live on his senses only” and he spoke to Me of My mission. He wanted to seduce the Messiah after failing with the young Man. And he incited Me to crush the unworthy ministers of the Temple with a miracle… A miracle, the fire of Heaven, is not to be bent to form a wicker wreath to crown ourselves… And we must not put God to the test, asking for miracles for human purposes. That is what Satan wanted. The reason mentioned by him was an excuse; the truth was: “Boast of being the Messiah”, as he wanted to lead Me to another lust: the lust for pride. He was not daunted by My reply: “You must not put the Lord your God to the test” and he circumvented Me with the third power of his nature: gold. Oh! gold. Bread is a great thing, and woman an even greater one for those longing for food or pleasure. To be acclaimed by the crowds is a very great thing for man. How many crimes are committed for these three things! But gold… gold! It is a key that opens, a circle that joins, it is the beginning and end of ninety-nine of human actions. For bread and a woman man becomes a thief. For power he becomes also a murderer. But for gold he becomes an idolator. The king of gold, Satan, offered Me his gold if I adored him. I pierced him with the eternal words: “You shall worship the Lord your God, and serve Him only.” It happened here. » Jesus is now standing. He seems taller than usual in the flat nature surrounding Him, in the slightly phosphorescent light of the stars. Also the disciples get up. Jesus goes on speaking, staring intently at Judas. « Then the angels of the Lord came… The Man had won the treble battle. The Man knew what it meant to be a man and had won. He was exhausted. The struggle had been more exhausting than the long fast… But the spirit was 80.Jesus Returns to the Mountain Where He Fasted and to the Rock of Temptation. 258 triumphant… I think that Heaven was startled at My becoming a perfect creature endowed with knowledge. I think that from that moment I got the power of working miracles. I was God. I had become the Man. Now, by defeating the animal nature connected with man's nature, I was the Man-God. And I am. And as God I am omnipotent. And as Man I am omniscient. Do as I did, if you want to do what I do. And do it in memory of Me. That man was amazed at My asking the Father's help, and at My praying not to be led into temptation. That is, not to be left at the mercy of temptation beyond My strength. I think that that man will no longer be amazed, now that he knows. I ask you to do the same in My memory and to win as I did. And never doubt My nature of true Man and true God, seeing how strong I was in all the temptations of life, and how I won the battles of the five senses, of sensuality and of sentiments. Remember all that. I promised to take you where it would be possible for you to know the Master… from the dawn of His day, a dawn which is as pure as the one which is now rising, to the noontide of His life. The noon which I left to go and meet My human evening… I said to one of you: “I also prepared”; you now see it is true. I thank you for your company in the return to the place of My birth and the place of My penance. My first contacts with the world had sickened and depressed Me. It is too ugly. My soul has now been nourished with the lion's marrow: the union with the Father in prayer and solitude. And I can go back to the world and take My cross upon Me once again, the first cross of the Redeemer: the cross of the contact with the world. With the world, in which there are too few souls called Mary, called John… Now listen, and you in particular, John. We are going back towards My Mother and our friends. I beg you not to mention to My Mother the harshness which has been opposed to the love of Her Son. She would suffer too much. She will suffer so much because of man's cruelty… but do not let us give Her the chalice now. It will be so bitter when it is given to Her! So bitter that it will creep like poison into Her holy viscera and veins and will gnash them and freeze Her heart. Oh! Do not tell My Mother that Bethlehem and Hebron rejected Me like a dog! Have mercy on Her! You, Simon, are old and good, and thoughtful as you are, you will not speak, I know. You, Judas, are a Judaean, and will not speak out of patriotic pride. But you, John, are a Galilean, and young, do not commit a sin of pride, criticism and cruelty. Be silent. Later… later you will tell the rest what I now ask you be silent about. There is already so much to be said about Christ. Why add to it what is Satan's work against Christ? My dear friends, do you promise Me that? » « Oh! Master! We do promise. Be certain of it. » « Thank you. Let us go to that small oasis. There is a spring, a well full of cold water and there is shade and greenery. The road towards the river passes near it. We will find food and refreshment till evening. By starlight, we will reach the river, the ford. And we will wait for Joseph or join him if he is already back. Let us go. » And they set out while the first pinkish hue in the sky, in the east, announces the rising of a new day.

79. Jesus on His Way Back Stops with the Shepherds near Hebron.

 79. Jesus on His Way Back Stops with the Shepherds near Hebron. 15th January 1945. Jesus is walking with His disciples on a road along the torrent. The road is not really running along the torrent. The torrent is below; high above, on the side of the mountain there is a twisting road, as is easily found in mountain places. John is almost purple, laden like a porter, with a big heavy satchel. Judas is carrying Jesus' bag and his own. Simon has only his bag and the mantles. Jesus is now wearing his own clothes and sandals. But Judas' mother must have had His tunic washed, because it is no longer creased. « How much fruit! How beautiful are those vineyards on those hills! » says John, who is always in good humour, notwithstanding the heat and the fatigue. « Master, is this the river on the banks of which our fathers picked the miraculous grapes? » « No, it is another one, farther south. But the whole region was blessed with rich fruit. » « It is not so blessed now, although still beautiful. » « Too many wars have devastated the country. Israel was made here… but it had to be fecundated by its own blood and by the blood of its enemies. » « Where will we find the shepherds? » « Five miles from Hebron, on the banks of the river you were enquiring about. » « Beyond that hill, then. » « Correct. » « It's very warm. The summer… Where are we going after, Master? » « To a place which is even warmer. But I ask you to come. We shall travel by night. The stars are so bright that there is no darkness. I want to show you a place… » « A town? » « No… A place… that will make you understand the Master… perhaps better than do His words. » « We lost some days over that stupid incident. It spoiled everything… and my mother who had prepared so much, was disappointed. I cannot understand why You wanted to segregate Yourself with the purification… » « Judas, why do you call stupid a fact that was a grace for a true believer? Would you not like such a death for yourself? He had waited all his life for the Messiah, and although an elderly man, he had gone along uncomfortable roads, to adore Him, when he was told: “He is here.” He had kept My Mother's word for thirty years in his heart. He was enraptured by the fire of love and faith in the last hour granted to him by God. His heart burst out of joy and was burnt, like a pleasing holocaust, by the fire of God. Which destiny could be better? He spoiled the feast you had prepared? You can see in that the answer of God. The things of man are not to be mixed with the things of God… Your mother will have Me again. The old man would not have had Me again. The whole of Kerioth can come to Christ, the old man had no more strength to do so. I am happy that I held the old dying father against My heart and I commended his soul. With regard to the rest… Why give scandal lacking respect for the Law? One must walk in front of the others if one wants to say: “Follow me.” And to lead people on to a holy path, one must walk on the same path. How could I have said, or how could I say: “Be faithful”, if I were faithless? » « I think that error is the cause of our decay. The rabbis and Pharisees crush the people with their precepts and then… then they behave like the man who desecrated John's house, making it a place of sin » remarks Simon. « He is one of Herod's… » « Yes, Judas, but the same faults are to be found also in the classes which are said – by themselves of course – to be holy. What do you say about it, Master? » asks Simon. 79. Jesus on His Way Back Stops with the Shepherds near Hebron. 251 « I say that only if there is a handful of true yeast and true incense in Israel, the bread will be made and the altar perfumed. » « What do you mean? » « I mean that if there is anyone coming to the Truth with a sincere heart, the Truth will spread like the yeast in the mass of flour and like incense all over Israel. » « What did that woman say to You? » asks Judas. Jesus does not reply. He instead addresses John: « Your load is heavy and you are tired. Give it to Me. » « No, Jesus, I am used to carrying weights and in any case… the thought of Isaac's joy makes it light. » They go round the hillock. Elias' sheep are in the shade of the wood, on the other side. And the shepherds, sitting in the shade are watching them. When they see Jesus they start running. « Peace to you. You are here? » « We were worried about You… because of the delay… and we didn't know whether to come and meet You or obey… then we decided to come so far… and thus obey Your instructions and satisfy our love at the same time. You were to be here many days ago. » « We had to stay… » « Nothing… wrong? » « No, My friends, nothing. A faithful believer died on My breast. Nothing else. » « What do you think should have happened, shepherd? When things are well arranged… Certainly one must know how to prepare them and prepare also hearts to receive them. My town paid every honor to Christ. Did they not, Master? » « Yes, they did. Isaac, on our way back we called at Sarah's. Also the town of Juttah, without any preparation other than its simple goodness and the truth of Isaac's words, understood the essence of My doctrine and learned how to love with a holy practical unselfish love. She sent you some clothes and food, Isaac, and everybody wanted to add something to the alms you left on your bed, because you are now back in the world and you lack everything. Take this. I never take money. But I accepted this because it is purified by charity. » « No, Master, You keep it. I… I am used to doing without it. » « You will now have to go to the various villages, to which I will send you. And you will need it. A workman is entitled to his pay, also If he deals with souls… because there is still a body to be nourished, as if it were a donkey helping its master. It is not much. But you will manage. John has some clothes and sandals in that bag. Joachim took some of his own. They may be too big… but there is so much love in the gift! » Isaac takes the bag and goes behind a bush to dress. He was still barefooted and was wearing his strange gown made from a blanket. « Master » says Elias. « That woman… the woman who is in John's house… three days after You left and we were pasturing the sheep on the meadows of Hebron – they belong to everybody, the meadows, and they could not send us away – she sent her maid to us with this bag and told us that she wanted to speak to us… I don't know whether I did the right thing… but the first time I gave the bag back to her and said: “I do not want to listen to her”… Then she sent this message: “Come in Jesus' name” and I went. She waited until her… well, the man who keeps her, had gone… How many things she wanted to know. But I… didn't tell her very much. Out of prudence. She is a prostitute. I was afraid it might be a trap for You. She asked me who You are, where You live, what You do, if You are a gentleman… I said: “He is Jesus of Nazareth, He goes everywhere, because He is a Master, and He goes round Palestine teaching”; I said You are a poor man, a simple workman, made wise by Wisdom… Nothing else. » « You did well » says Jesus, and Judas at the same moment exclaims: « You did the wrong thing! Why did you not say that He is the Messiah, the King of the world? The proud Roman woman should be crushed under the blow of God's splendour. » « She would not have understood me… In any case how could I be sure that she was sincere? When you saw her, you said what she is. Was I to throw holy things, and everything that is Jesus is holy, into her mouth? Was I to endanger Jesus, giving too much information? Anyone may hurt Him, but I will not. » « John, let us go and tell her who the Master is, and explain the holy truth to her. 79. Jesus on His Way Back Stops with the Shepherds near Hebron. 252 » « Not me. Unless Jesus tells me. » « Are you afraid? What can she do to you? Do you loathe her? The Master did not. » « I am not afraid, neither do I loathe her. I feel sorry for her. But I think that if Jesus wanted, He could have stopped to teach her. He did not do it… it is not necessary for us to do it. » « At the time there were no signs of a conversion… Now… Show me the bag, Elias. » And Judas, who is sitting on the grass, empties the bag on his mantle. Rings, armlets, bracelets and a necklace roll out: yellow gold on the dark gold of Judas' mantle. « They are jewels!… What can we do with them? » « They can be sold » says Simon. « They are troublesome things » remarks Judas, who, however, admires them. « That's what I told her, when I took them; I also said: “Your master will beat you.” She replied: “They do not belong to him. They are mine and I do what I want with them. I know it is the gold of sins… but it will become good if used for the poor and the holy. That they may remember me” » and she was crying. « Go and see her, Master. » « No. » « Send Simon. » « No. » « Well, I'll go. » « No. » Jesus' « No » is sharp and peremptory. « Was I wrong, Master, in speaking to her and taking that gold? » asks Elias, when he sees Jesus so serious. « You did nothing wrong. But there is nothing more to be done. » « But perhaps that woman wants to redeem herself and she needs to be taught… » Judas objects once again. « There are already in her so many sparks capable of starting a fire which will burn her vices and purify her soul and repentance will render her innocent once again. A few minutes ago I spoke to you of the yeast which is mixed with the flour and turns it into holy bread. Listen now to a short parable. That woman is the flour. A flour in which the Evil One has mixed his hellish powders. I am the yeast. That is, My word is the yeast. But if there is too much chaff in the flour, or if sand, or little stones or ashes are mixed in it, is it possible to make bread with it, even if the yeast is good? It is not possible. It is necessary to patiently remove the chaff, the ashes, stones and sand from the flour. Then Mercy passes by and offers the first sieve… The first one: made with short basic truths, which may be understood by one entangled in the net of total ignorance, vice and Gentilism. If the soul accepts it, the first purification begins. The second takes place by means of the sieve of the soul itself, which compares its own being with the Being that revealed Itself. And the soul is horrified. And it starts its work. By means of a more and more particular operation, after the stones, the sand and the ashes, it reaches the point of removing also that part of the flour consisting of grains too heavy and too coarse to make good bread. The soul is now ready. Mercy then passes by once again and penetrates into the flour now ready – that is a preparation too, Judas – and raises it and turns it into bread. But it is a long operation: an operation of the “will power” of the soul. That woman already has in herself the minimum which was fair to give her and which may be used by her to accomplish her work. Let her do it, if she wishes to, but we must not disturb her. Everything upsets a soul which is working: curiosity, unadvised zeal, intolerance as well as excessive compassion. » « We are not going to see her, then? » « No. And that none of you may be tempted to, let us leave at once. There is shade in the wood. We will stop at the foot of the Terebinth Valley. And we will part there. Elias will go back to his pastures with Levi: Joseph will come with Me as far as the Jericho ford. Later… we will meet again. You, Isaac, continue what you did at Juttah, going from here, through Arimathaea and Lydda, to Doco. We will meet there. It is necessary to prepare Judaea, and you know how to do it. Exactly as you did at Juttah ». « And what about us? » « You? You will come, as I said, to see My preparation. Also I prepared for My 79. Jesus on His Way Back Stops with the Shepherds near Hebron. 253 mission. » « Did You go to a rabbi's? » « No. » « Did You go to John? » « I was only baptized by him. » « Well, then? » « Bethlehem spoke with its stones and its hearts. Also where I am taking you, Judas, the stones and a heart, Mine, will speak to you and give you the answer. » Elias, who has brought some milk and brown bread, says: « While waiting for You, I tried, and Isaac tried with me, to convince the people in Hebron… But they will not believe, they will not take an oath, they do not want anyone but John. He is their “holy man” and they do not want anyone else. » « It is a sin quite common to many places and many present and future believers. They look at the workman, not at the master who sent the workman. They ask the workman questions and they do not even say to him: “Tell your master.” They forget that there is a workman only because there is a master and that it is the master who instructs the workman and enables him to work. They forget that the workman can intercede, but only the master can concede. In this case God and His Word with Him. It does not matter. The Word is sorry but bears no grudge. Let us go. » The vision end

78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul.

 78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul. 14th January 1945. I am under the impression that the steepest part, that is the closest tangle of Judaean mountains, is between Hebron and Juttah. But I may be mistaken, and this valley may be wider, opening on to wider horizons, with isolated mountains emerging here and there, not forming any real chain. It may be a valley between two chains of mountains. I do not know. It is the first time I see it, and I am puzzled. The fields are not very large, but they are well cultivated with various cereals: mainly barley and rye. There are also some nice vineyards in the sunny parts. Higher up, I can see some lovely forests of Pinetrees and fir-trees and other trees typical of woody places. A reasonably good road leads into a small village. « This is the suburb of Kerioth. Please come to my country house. My mother is waiting for You there. We will go to Kerioth afterwards » says Judas who is beside himself with excitement. I omitted to mention that only Judas, Simon and John are now with Jesus. The shepherds are not here. Perhaps they remained in the pastures of Hebron or they have gone back towards Bethlehem. « As you wish, Judas, but we could have stopped even here to meet your mother. » « Oh! No! It is only a farm house. My mother comes here at harvest time. But she lives in Kerioth. And do You not want my town people to see You? Do You not want to take Your light to them? » « I certainly do, Judas. But you already are aware that I do not mind the humility of the place that gives Me hospitality. » « But today You are my guest… and Judas knows how to be hospitable. » They walk for a few more yards among houses spread about the country, while men and women look out, called by children. It is obvious that their curiosity has been awakened. Judas must have sent word warning them. « Here is my poor house. Forgive its poverty. » But, after all, the house is not a hovel: it consists of a large and well kept ground floor only, in the middle of a thick flowering orchard. A small private clean road leads from the main road to the house. « May I go ahead of You, Master? » « Yes, go. » Judas goes. « Master, Judas has done things in great style » says Simon, « I rather suspected he would. But now I am certain. Master, You keep saying, and quite rightly, spirit… But he… he does not see things that way. He will never understand You… or perhaps only very late » he adds not to grieve Jesus. Jesus sighs and is silent. Judas comes out with a woman who is about fifty years old. She is rather tall, but not so tall as her son, who has her same dark eyes and curly hair. But her eyes are kind and rather sad, whereas those of Judas are imperious and shrewd. « I greet You, King of Israel » she says prostrating herself in a real salutation of a subject. « Allow Your servant to give You hospitality. » 78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul. 245 « Peace to you, woman. And may God be with you and your creature. » « Oh! yes! With my creature. » It sounds more like a sigh than a reply. « Stand up, mother. I have a Mother, too, and I cannot allow you to kiss My feet. I kiss you, woman, in My Mother's name. She is a sister of yours… in love and in the painful destiny of the mother of those who are marked. » « What do You mean, Messiah? » asks Judas somewhat worried. But Jesus does not reply. He is embracing the woman, whom He has kindly raised up from the ground and is now kissing her cheeks. And, holding her hand, He walks toward the house. They go into a cool room, which is shaded by light striped curtains. Cold drinks and fresh fruit are already laid out. But first of all Judas' mother calls a maidservant who brings in water and the landlady would like to take off Jesus' sandals and wash His dusty feet. But Jesus objects. « No, mother. A mother is too holy a person, particularly when she is honest and good, as you are, to be allowed to take the attitude of a slave… » The mother looks at Judas… an unusual look. She then goes away. Jesus has refreshed Himself. When He is about to put on His sandals, the woman comes back with a new pair. « Here, Messiah. I think I have done the right thing… as Judas wanted… He said to me: “A little longer than mine, but the same width.”» « But why, Judas? » « Will You not let me offer You a gift? Are You not my King and my God? » « Yes, Judas. But you must not give so much trouble to your mother. You know what I am like… » « I know. You are holy. But You must appear as a holy King. That is how one imposes oneself. – In the world, where nine tenths of the folk are foolish people, we must impose ourselves with our appearance. Trust me. » Jesus has fastened the red leather open-work straps of the new sandals, which reach up to His ankles. They are much nicer than His plain sandals of a workman, and they resemble Judas' sandals, which are like shoes with openwork showing parts of his feet. « Also the tunic, my King. I prepared it for Judas… But he makes a present of it to You. It's a linen one: cool and new. Allow a mother to put it on You… as if You were her son. » Jesus looks at Judas once again… but does not speak. He unties the lace of His tunic, round His neck, and lets His wide tunic fall on to the floor and thus is left with only His short under-tunic. The woman puts on Him the lovely new garment. She offers Him a belt, which is richly embroidered braid, from which a cord hangs down, decorated with very thick tassels. Jesus must feel comfortable in the cool clean clothes, but He does not seem very happy. In the meantime the others have cleaned themselves. « Come, Master. They come from my poor orchard. And this is honeyed water, prepared by my mother. Perhaps, Simon, you would prefer this white wine. Have some. It is the wine of my vineyard. And what about you, John? Will you have the same as the Master? » Judas is overjoyed at pouring the drinks into beautiful silver cups, thus showing his wealth. His mother is not very talkative. She looks… looks… at Judas, and even more at Jesus, and when Jesus, before eating, offers her the nicest fruit (possibly very big apricots, they are yellow red fruits, certainly not apples) and He says to her: « First of all to mother, always », her eyes well with tears. « Mother, is the rest ready? » asks Judas. « Yes, son. I think I have done everything well. But I was brought up here and I have always lived here and I do not know… I do not know the habits of kings. » « Which habits, woman? Which kings? What have You done, Judas? » « Are You not the promised King of Israel? It is time that the world should salute You as such, and that must happen for the first time here, in my town, in my house. I revere You as such. For my sake, and for the respect due to Your names of Messiah, Christ, King, which the Prophets gave You by Yahweh's command, do not give me the lie. » « Woman, friends, please. I must speak to Judas. I have precise instructions to give him. » The mother and the disciples withdraw. « Judas: what have you done? Have you understood so little of Me so far? Why lower Me to the extent of making Me only a mighty man of the world, nay: a 78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul. 246 man intriguing to become mighty? And do you not understand that that is an offence, nay an obstacle to My mission? Yes. Do not deny it. It is an obstacle. Israel is subjected to Rome. You know what happened when they raised against Rome someone who seemed a mob-leader and aroused the suspicion of creating an insurrection. Only a few days ago you heard how pitiless they were against a Child because they were afraid He might be a king according to the world. And yet you!… Oh! Judas! What do you expect from the sovereignty of the flesh? What do you expect? I gave you time to think and decide. I spoke to you very clearly from the very first time. I also sent you away because I knew… because I know, I read and see what is in you. Why do you want to follow Me, if you do not want to be as I want you? Go away, Judas. Do not harm yourself and do not harm Me… Go away. It is better for you. You are not a suitable worker for this task. It is by far too much above you. In you there is pride, there is greed and all its three branches, there is arrogance… even your mother must be afraid of you… you are inclined to falsehood… No, My follower must not be like that. Judas, I do not hate you, I do not curse you. I only say to you, and I am saying it with the grief of one who knows he cannot change the person he loves, I only say to you: go your way, make your way in the world, since that is what you want, but do not stay with Me. My life!… My royal palace! How small and mean they are! Do you know where I will be a King? When I will be proclaimed King? When I will be raised up, upon an ill-famed piece of wood and My own blood will be My purple, and My crown will be a wreath of thorns and My insignia a mocking poster and the curses of all the people, of My people, will be the trumpets, the tambourines, the organs, the citherns saluting the proclamation of the King. And do you know by whose deed all this will happen? By the deed of one who did not understand Me. One who will have understood nothing. One, whose heart was a hollow piece of bronze, which pride, sensuality and avarice had filled with their humours, which will generate coils of snakes that will be used to chain Me and… and to curse him. The others are not so well aware of My destiny. Please do not tell them. Let us keep this to ourselves. In any case it, is a reproach… and you will keep quiet to avoid saying: “I was reproached”… Is that clear, Judas? » Judas has blushed so much, that he looks purple. He is standing before Jesus, mortified, his head lowered… He kneels down and he cries with his head on Jesus' knees: « I love you, Master, Don't reject me. Yes, I am proud and foolish, but don't send me away. No. Master. I will never do it again. You are right. It was thoughtless of me. But there is some love in my mistake. I wanted to honor You… and I wanted the others to honor You as well… because I love You. You said so three days ago: “When you make a mistake without malice, out of ignorance, it is not an error, but an imperfect judgement: like the error of children, and I am here to make adults of you.” Here I am, here against Your knees… You said You would be a father to me… and I am here against Your knees as if they were my father's, and I ask You to forgive me, and to make an “adult” of me, a holy adult… Don't send me away, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus… Not everything is wicked in me. You know: I left everything for you and I have come. You are much more than the honors and victories I got serving other people. You are indeed the love of poor unhappy Judas who would like to give You nothing but joy, and is instead the cause of pain for You… » « That is all right, Judas. I forgive you once again… » Jesus looks tired… « I forgive you, hoping… hoping that in future you will understand Me. » « Yes, Master. But, now, do not give me the lie, otherwise I will be laughed at. Everybody in Kerioth knows that I was coming with David's Descendant, the King of Israel… and the town has made preparations to welcome You… I thought I was doing a good thing… showing You what one must do to be respected and obeyed… and I also wanted to show John and Simon, and through them, all the others who love You but treat You as their equal… Also my mother would be mocked at, as the mother of a mad liar. For her sake, my Lord… And I swear that I… » « Do not swear to Me. Swear to yourself, if you can, that You will not commit such a sin again. For the sake of your mother and your fellow citizens I will not shame you by going away without stopping here. Stand up. » « What will You tell the others? » « The truth… » « No, don't. » « The truth: that I gave you instructions for today. It is always possible to tell the truth in a charitable way. Let us go. Call Your mother and the others. » Jesus is rather severe. He smiles again only when Judas comes back with his mother and the disciples. The woman gazes at Jesus, but she gains confidence 78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul. 247 when she sees His kind disposition. I get the impression she is in great distress. « Shall we go to Kerioth? I have rested and I wish to thank you, mother, for all your kindness. May Heaven reward you and grant rest and peace to your late husband, for all your charity to Me. » The woman tries to kiss His hand, but Jesus caresses her head and thus prevents her from doing so. « The wagon is ready, Master. Come. » Outside, in fact, an ox cart is just arriving. It is a comfortable cart, on which they have placed cushions as seats and a red tent as a cover. « Get on, Master. » « Your mother, first. » The woman gets on and then Jesus and the others. « Sit here, Master. » (Judas no longer calls Him king). Jesus sits in front, and Judas sits beside Him. The woman and the disciples are behind. The man driving the cart goads the oxen walking beside them. It is a short journey: about four hundred meters, probably a little more. The first houses of Kerioth are now visible and it looks like a decent little town. A little boy on the sunny road is watching and he immediately dashes away. When the cart reaches the first houses, the notables and the people welcome Him; the houses are decorated with draperies and branches. The people shout with joy and bow down deeply. Jesus, from the height of His shaking throne, can but greet them and bless them. The cart moves on and after crossing a square it turns into a street, where it stops before a house the door of which is already wide open. Two or three women are standing at the door. They stop and get off. « My house is Yours, Master. » « Peace to it, Judas. Peace and holiness. » They go in. Beyond the hall there is a large room, with low divans and inlaid furniture. The notables of the place and other people go in with Jesus. There is a lot of bowing and curiosity: a showy joyfulness. An impressive elderly man delivers a speech: « it is a great honor for the land of Kerioth to receive You, my Lord. A great fortune! A happy day! It is a great fortune to have You and to see that a son of Kerioth is Your friend and assistant. May he be blessed because he met You before everyone else! And may You be blessed ten times ten because you have revealed Yourself: You are the one Who has been expected for generations and generations. Speak, my Lord and King. Our hearts are anxious to hear Your word, just as the land parched by a fiery summer awaits the first soft showers in September. » « Thank you, whoever you are. Thank you. And thanks to these citizens whose hearts have honored the Word of the Father, and the Father Whose Word I am. Because You must understand that thanks and honor are due not to the Son of man, Who is speaking to you, but to the Most High Lord, for this time of peace during which He re-establishes the broken paternity with the sons of man. Let us praise the true Lord, the God of Abraham Who had mercy on and loved His people and granted them the promised Redeemer. Glory and praise not to Jesus, the servant of the Eternal Will, but to the loving Will. » « Your words are the words of a holy man: I am the chief of the synagogue. Today it is not a Sabbath. But come to my house, to explain the Law, since You are anointed with Wisdom, rather than with royal oil. » « I will come. » « Perhaps my Lord is tired… » « No, Judas, I am never tired of speaking of God and I am never anxious to disappoint the hearts of men. » « Come, then » the synagogue chief insists. « The whole of Kerioth is out there waiting for You. » « Let us go. » They go out. Jesus is between Judas and the arch synagogue, around them there are the notables and the crowds. Jesus passes through them blessing. The synagogue is on the square. They go in. Jesus goes to the lectern. He begins to speak, bright in His beautiful robes, His face inspired, His arms stretched out in His usual attitude. « People of Kerioth, the Word of God is speaking to you. Listen. He Who is speaking to you is but the Word of God. His sovereignty comes from the Father 78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul. 248 and will return to the Father after Israel has been evangelized. May your hearts and minds be opened to the truth, so that you may be freed from errors and confusion. Isaiah said: “For all the footgear of battle, every cloak rolled in blood, is burnt and consumed by fire. For there is a Child born to us, a Son given to us, and dominion is laid on His shoulders; and this is the name they give Him: WonderCounselor, Mighty-God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.” That is My Name. We leave to Caesar and the Tetrarchs their preys. I will commit a robbery. But not a robbery deserving to be punished by fire. On the contrary I will snatch from Satan's fire many of his preys and I will take them to the Kingdom of peace, of which I am the Prince, and to the future century: the eternal time of which I am the Father. “God”, says David, from whose stock I descend, as was prophesied by those who saw the future because of their holiness which was so pleasing to God, that He chose them as His messengers, “God elected one only… my son… but the work is great: this palace is not for man but for God.” It is so. God, the King of kings, elected one person only: His Son, to build His house in the hearts of men. And He has already prepared the materials. Oh! How much gold of charity! and copper, silver, iron, rare wood and precious stones! They are all gathered in his Word Who makes use of them to build God's abode in you. But if man does not help the Lord, the Lord will build His dwelling place in vain. One must reply to gold with gold, to silver with silver, to copper with copper, to iron with iron. That is, love is to be given for love, continence to serve Purity, perseverance to be loyal, strength to be steadfast. And one must carry stones today, wood tomorrow: a sacrifice today, a deed tomorrow and thus build. You must always build the Temple of God in your hearts. The Master, the Messiah, the King of everlasting Israel and of God's eternal people, calls you. But He wants you to be pure for the work. Relinquish pride: praise is due to God. Relinquish human thoughts: the Kingdom belongs to God. Be humble and say with Me: “All things are Yours, Father. Everything that is good is Yours. Teach us how to know You and serve You in truth.” Say: “Who am I?” And acknowledge that you will be something only when you become purified dwellings into which God may descend and rest. You are all pilgrims and strangers in this world, learn how to gather together and proceed towards the promised Kingdom. The road: the commandments fulfilled not because of fear of a punishment, but out of love for You, holy Father. The Ark: a perfect heart in which the nourishing manna of wisdom is treasured and the branch of a pure will is certain to bloom. And come to the Light of the world, that your houses may be bright with light. I bring you the Light. Nothing else. I have no riches and I do not promise worldly honors. But I possess all the supernatural wealth of My Father and I promise the eternal honor of Heaven to those who will follow God with love and charity. Peace be with you. » The people who have listened attentively, begin to murmur somewhat agitated. Jesus speaks to the head of the synagogue. Other people, perhaps the notables, join the group. « Master, but are You not the King of Israel? We were told… » « I am. » « But You said… » « That I neither possess nor promise worldly Wealth. I can speak but the truth. Yes, it is so. I know what you think. But the error is due to a misinterpretation and your great respect for the Most High. You were told: “The Messiah is coming” and you thought, like many in Israel, that Messiah and king were the same thing. Raise your minds higher up. Look at this beautiful summer sky. Do you think it ends there, where the air seems a sapphire vault? No, the most pure, the most azure spheres are beyond it, up as far as Paradise, which no one can imagine, where the Messiah will lead all the just who die in the Lord. The same difference exists between the Messiah's royalty, as understood by men, and His true Royalty: which is entirely divine. » « But will we, poor men, be able to raise our minds so far up? » « Yes, if you only want to. And if you want to, I will help you. » « How shall we call You, if You are not a king? » « Call Me Master, or Jesus, as you wish. I am a Master and I am Jesus, the Savior. » An old man says: « Listen, my Lord. Some time ago, a long time ago, at the time of the edict, we heard here that the Savior was born in Bethlehem… and I went there with other people… I saw a little Baby, exactly like all other new-born babies. But I adored Him with faith. Later I heard that there was a holy man, 78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul. 249 whose name is John. Which is the true Messiah? » « The One you adored. The other is His Precursor: a great saint in the eyes of the Most High. But he is not the Messiah. » « Was it You? » « It was I. And what did you see around the new-born Child? » « Poverty and cleanliness, honesty and purity… A kind grave carpenter, whose name was Joseph, a carpenter but of the House of David, a young mother, fair and kind, whose name was Mary, before whose grace the most beautiful roses of Engedi turn pale and the lilies of the royal flower beds seem misshapen, and a Child with large blue eyes and pale gold hair… I saw nothing else… And I can still hear the voice of the Mother say to me: “On behalf of My Creature I say to You: may the Lord be with you until the eternal meeting and may His Grace come towards you on your way.” I am eighty-four years old… my way is near its end. I was no longer expecting to meet the Grace of God. Instead I have found You… and now I do not wish to see any other light than Yours… Yes. I see You as You are in this merciful attire, which is the flesh You have taken. I see You! Listen to the voice of a man who sees the Light of God while dying! » The people press round the old inspired man, who is in Jesus' group. No longer leaning on his walking stick, he lifts his trembling arms and raises his white head, which, with its byparted beard, seems the head of a patriarch or a prophet. « I see Him: The Chosen, Supreme, Perfect One, Who descended here out of love, I see Him rise again to the right hand side of the Father and become One with Him. But… Oh! He is not just a Voice' or an incorporeal Essence, as Moses saw the Most High, or as Genesis tells the First Parents heard Him and spoke to Him in the evening breeze. I see Him as real Flesh rising to the Eternal Father. Blazing Flesh! Glorious Flesh! Oh! Pomp of Divine Flesh! Oh! Beauty of the Man-God! He is the King! Yes. The King. Not of Israel: of the world. All the royalties of the earth bow to Him and all the scepters and crowns fade away in the splendour of His scepter and jewels. He has a crown on His head and a scepter in His hand. He wears a rational on His chest: it is adorned with pearls and rubies, the brightness of which was never seen before. Flames issue from it as if it were a blazing furnace. There are two rubies on His wrists and buckles with rubies are on His holy feet. There is so much light from the rubies! Admire, peoples, the Eternal King! I see You! I see You! I am rising with You… Ah! Lord! Our Redeemer!… The light increases within my soul… The King is decorated with His own Blood! The crown is a wreath of bleeding thorns. The scepter is a cross… Here is the Man! He is here! It is You!… Lord, for the sake of Your sacrifice have mercy on Your servant, Jesus, I commend my soul to Your mercy. » The old man, who so far had stood up, rejuvenated by the fire of prophecy, suddenly collapses and would fall if Jesus were not quick in holding him up against His chest. « Saul. » « Saul is dying! » « Help! » « Be quick. » « Peace to the just man who is dying » says Jesus, Who has slowly knelt down to support the old man, who has become heavier and heavier. There is silence. Then Jesus lays him down on the ground. And He stands up. « Peace to his soul. He died seeing the Light. In his expectation which will be a short one, he will already see the face of God and will be happy. There is no death, that is parting from life, for those who died in the Lord. » The people, after a little while, go away commenting. The elders, Jesus, His disciples and the archsynagogue remain. « Did he prophesy, Lord. » « His eyes saw the Truth. Let us go. » They go out. « Master, Saul died enraptured by the Spirit of God. We touched him, are we clean or unclean? » « Unclean. » « And what about You? » « I am just like the others. I do not change the Law. The Law is law and an Israelite fulfills it. We are unclean. Within the third and the seventh day we shall 78. Jesus at Kerioth. Death of Old Saul. 250 get purified. Till then, we are unclean. Judas, I am not going back to your mother's. I do not want to take uncleanliness to her home. Send her word by someone who can go there. Peace to this town. Let us go. » I do not see anything else.

77. Jesus at Hebron. Zacharias' House. Aglae.

 77. Jesus at Hebron. Zacharias' House. Aglae. 13th January 1945. « At what time will we be arriving? » asks Jesus Who is walking in the centre of the group behind the sheep, grazing on the grass on the banks. « At about the third hour. It's almost ten miles » replies Elias. « Are we going to Kerioth afterwards? » asks Judas. « Yes, we will go there. » 77. Jesus at Hebron. Zacharias' House. Aglae. 240 « Was it not quicker to go to Kerioth from Juttah? It cannot be a great distance. Is that correct, shepherd? » « About two miles longer, more or less. » « This way, we will be doing over twenty for nothing. » « Judas, why are you so worried? » « I am not worried, Master. But You promised You would come to my house. » « And I will. I always keep My promises. » « I sent word to my mother… and after all, You said so Yourself, one can be near the dead also with one's soul. » « I did. But just think, Judas: you have not yet suffered because of Me. These people have been suffering for thirty years, and they have never betrayed, not even My memory they betrayed. They did not know whether I was dead or alive… and yet they remained faithful. They remembered Me as a newly-born baby, an infant with nothing but tears and the need of milk… and they have always worshipped Me as God. Because of Me they have been beaten, cursed and persecuted as if they were the disgrace of Judaea, and yet their faith has never faltered, neither did it wither under blows, on the contrary it took deeper roots and became stronger. » « By the way. For some days I have been anxious to ask You a question. These people are Your friends and the friends of God, are they not? The angels blessed them with the peace of Heaven, did they not? They have been faithful against all temptations, have they not? Would You explain to me, then, why they are unhappy? And what about Anne? She was killed because she loved You… » « Are you therefore deducing that to be loved by Me and to love Me brings bad luck? » « No… but… » « But you are. I am sorry to see you so closed to the Light and so open to human things. No, never mind John, and you too, Simon. I prefer him to speak. I never reproach. I only want you to open your souls to Me that I may enlighten them. Come here, Judas, listen. You are basing yourself on an opinion which is common to many people of our times and will be common to many in future. I said: an opinion. I should say: an error. But since you do not do so out of malice, but out of ignorance of the truth, it is not an error, it is only an incorrect opinion like a child's. And you are like children, My poor men. And I am here, as a Master, to make adults of you, capable of telling the truth from the false, good from bad and what is better from what is good. Listen to Me, therefore. What is life? It is a period of pause, I would say the limbo of Limbo, that the God Father grants you as trial to ascertain whether you are good or bad children, after which He will allot, according to your deeds, a future life without pauses or trials. Now tell Me: would it be fair if a man, simply because he has been granted the rare gift of being in the position of serving God in a special way, had also an everlasting wealth throughout his life? Do you not think that he has already been granted a great deal and may therefore consider himself happy, even if human things are against him? Would it not be unfair if he, who already has the light of divine revelation in his heart and the smile of a clear conscience, should also have worldly honors and wealth? And would it not also be unwise?» « Master, I would also say that he would be a desecrator. Why put human joys where You already are? When one has You – and they had You, they are the only rich people in Israel because they have had You for thirty years – one should have nothing else. We do not put human things on the Propitiatory… and the consecrated vase is used only for sacred uses. And these people are consecrated since the day they saw Your smile… and nothing but You is to enter their hearts, which possess You. I wish I was like them! » says Simon. « But you wasted no time, immediately after you saw the Master and were cured, in getting back your property » Judas replies ironically. « That is true. I said I would and I did. But do you know why? How can you judge if you do not know the whole situation? My representative was given precise instructions. Now that Simon Zealot has been cured – and his enemies can no longer harm him, neither can they persecute him because he belongs only to Jesus and to no sect: he has Jesus and nothing else – Simon can dispose of his wealth which an honest and faithful servant kept for him. And I, being the owner for a further short time, gave instructions that the estate should be reorganised, so that I would get more money when selling it and I would be able to say… no, I am not telling what. » « The angels tell, Simon and they are writing it in the eternal book » says Jesus. 77. Jesus at Hebron. Zacharias' House. Aglae. 241 Simon looks at Jesus. Their eyes meet: Simon's express surprise, Jesus' blessing approval. « As usual. I am wrong. » « No, Judas. You have a practical sense, you said so yourself. » « Oh! but with Jesus!… Also Simon Peter was full of practical sense, now instead!… You, too, Judas, will become like him. You have only been with the Master a short time, we have been longer with Him, and we are already better » says John who is always kind and conciliatory. « He did not want me. Otherwise I would have been His since Passover. » Judas is really bad-tempered today. Jesus puts an end to the argument by asking Levi: « Have you ever been to Galilee? » « Yes, my Lord. » « You will come with Me, to take Me to Jonah. Do you know him? » « Yes, I do. We always met at Passover. I used to go and see him then. » Joseph, mortified, lowers his head. Jesus notices and says: « You cannot both come. Elias would be left alone with the sheep. But you will come with Me as far as the Jericho pass, where we will part for some time. I will tell you after what you have to do. » « What about us? Will we not do anything? » « Yes, you will, Judas, you will. » « There are some houses over there » says John, who is walking a few steps in front of the others. « It's Hebron. Between two rivers with its crest. See, Master? That house there, amidst all the green, a little higher up than the others? That's Zacharias' house. » « Let us quicken our paces. » They cover the last stretch of the road very rapidly and go into the village. The sheep's little hooves sound like castanets on the uneven stones of the road, which is paved very roughly. They reach the house. People look at the group of men, who are so different by look, age and garments amongst the white sheep. « Oh! It's different! There was a gate here! » says Elias. Now in place of the gate there is a metal door which prevents one from seeing, and also the enclosure wall is higher than a man and thus nothing can be seen inside. « Perhaps it will be open at the back. » They go round a large quadrilateral wall, it is rather a long rectangular one, but the wall is the same height all round. « The wall was built not long ago » remarks John, examining it. « There is not a scratch on it and there is still lime rubble on the ground. » « I cannot even see the sepulcher… It was near the wood. Now the wood is outside the wall and… and it seems to belong to everybody. They are gathering firewood in it. » Elias is puzzled. A man, an old woodcutter, small but strong, who is watching the group, stops sawing a trunk which he has cut down, and goes towards the group. « Whom are you looking for? » « We wanted to go in, to pray on Zacharias' tomb ». « There is no tomb any longer. Don't you know? Who are you? » « I am a friend of Samuel, the shepherd. This… » « It is not necessary, Elias » says Jesus and Elias keeps quiet. « Ah! Samuel!… I see! But since John, Zacharias' son, was put into prison, the house is no longer his. And it is a misfortune, because he had all the profit of his property given to the poor people in Hebron. One morning a man came from Herod's court, he threw Jowehel out, he affixed seals, then he came back with bricklayers and they started raising the wall… The sepulcher was over there, in the corner. He did not want it… and one morning we found it all spoiled and half destroyed… the poor bones were all scattered… We put them together again, as well as we could… They are now in a sarcophagus… And in the house of the priest Zacharias, that filthy man keeps his lovers. Now there is a mime from Rome. That is why he raised the wall. He does not want people to see… The house of the priest a brothel! The house of the miracle and of the Precursor! For it is certainly him, if he is not the Messiah. And how much trouble we had because of the Baptist! But he is our great man! He is really great! Even when he was born there was a miracle. Elizabeth was as old as a withered thistle but 77. Jesus at Hebron. Zacharias' House. Aglae. 242 she became as fruitful as an apple in Adar, and that was the first miracle. Then a cousin of hers came and She was a holy woman, and She served her and loosened the priest's tongue. Her name was Mary. I remember Her, although we saw Her very rarely. How it happened I don't know. They say that to make Elizabeth happy, She made Zacharias put his mute mouth against Her pregnant bosom or that She put Her fingers into his mouth. I don't know. It is a fact, that after nine months' silence, Zacharias spoke praising the Lord and saying that there was a Messiah. He did not explain more. But my wife was there that day and she assured me that Zacharias, praising the Lord, said that his son would precede Him. Now I say: it is not what people believe. John is the Messiah and he goes before the Lord, as Abraham went before God. That's what it is. Am I not right? » « You are right with regard to the spirit of the Baptist, who always proceeds before God. But you are not right with regard to the Messiah ». « Well, the woman who said that She was the Mother of the Son of God – Samuel said so – was it not true that She was? Is She still living? » « Yes, She was. The Messiah was born, preceded by him who raised his voice in the desert, as the Prophet said. » « You are the first to say so. John, the last time that Jowehel took him a sheepskin, which he did every year at the beginning of winter, although he was questioned about the Messiah, did not say: “The Messiah is here.” When he will say so… » « Man, I was a disciple of John and I heard him say: “Here is the Lamb of God” pointing to… » says John. « No, no. He is the Lamb. A true Lamb who grew up by himself, almost without the need of a father and mother. As soon as he became a son of the Law, he lived isolated in the mountain caves overlooking the desert, and he grew up there conversing with God. Elizabeth and Zacharias died, and he did not come. God only was his father and mother. There is no holy man greater than he is. You can ask everyone in Hebron. Samuel used to say so, but the people in Bethlehem must have been right. John is the holy man of God. » « If someone said to you: “I am the Messiah”, what would you say? » asks Jesus. « I would call him a “blasphemer” and I would drive him away, throwing stones at him. » « And if he worked a miracle to prove that he was the Messiah? » « I would say that he was “possessed”. The Messiah will come when John reveals himself in his true nature. The very hatred of Herod is the proof. Cunning as he is, he knows that John is the Messiah. » « He was not born in Bethlehem. » « But when he is freed, after announcing by himself his impending oncoming, he will reveal himself in Bethlehem. Also Bethlehem is waiting for that. Whilst… Oh! Go, if you have plenty of guts, and talk to the Bethlehemites of another Messiah… and you will see… » « Have you a synagogue? » « Yes, about two hundred steps straight ahead. You cannot go wrong. Near it there is the sarcophagus with the violated remains. » « Goodbye, may God enlighten you. » They go away. They turn round on to the front of the house. At the door there is a young woman impudently dressed. She is beautiful. « My Lord, do you wish to come into the house? Come in. » Jesus stares at her as severe as a judge, but does not speak. But Judas does, supported by all the others. « Go back in, shameless woman! Do not desecrate us with your breath, ravenous bitch. » The woman blushes and lowers her head. She is about to disappear abashed and scoffed at by urchins and passersby. « Who is so pure as to say: “I have never desired the apple offered by Eve?” » asks Jesus severely and He adds: « Show Me him and I will call him a holy man. Nobody? Well, then, if not out of disgust, but out of weakness, you feel unable to go near this woman, you may withdraw. I will not force weaklings into unequal struggles. Woman, I would like to come in. This house belonged to a relative of Mine and is dear to Me. » 77. Jesus at Hebron. Zacharias' House. Aglae. 243 « Come in, my Lord, if You do not loathe me. » « Leave the door open, that the world may see and may not tattle… » Jesus enters serious and solemn. The woman, subdued, bows down before Him and dares not move. But the quips of the people cut her to the quick. She runs away to the end of the garden, while Jesus goes as far as the foot of the staircase. He looks in through the half open doors but does not go in. He then goes to the place of the sepulcher, where there is now a kind of small pagan temple. « The bones of the just, also when dry and scattered, ooze a purifying balm and spread seed of eternal life. Peace to the dead who lived doing good! Peace to the pure who are sleeping in the Lord! Peace to those who suffered, but knew no vice! Peace to the real great ones of the world and of Heaven! Peace! » The woman has reached Jesus, walking along the hedge that protects her. « My Lord! » « Woman. » « Your Name, my Lord. » « Jesus. » « I never heard it. I am Roman: a mime and dancer. I am an expert only in lust. What is the meaning of Your name? My name is Aglae and… and it means: vice. » « Mine means: Savior. » « How do You save? And whom? » « Those who are anxious to be saved. I save by teaching to be pure, to prefer sorrows to honors, to desire good at all costs, » Jesus speaks without bitterness, without even turning towards the woman. « I am lost… » « I am the One seeking who is lost. » « I am dead. » « I am the One who gives Life. » « I am filth and falsehood. » « I am Purity and Truth. » « You are also Bounty, You do not look at me. You do not touch me, You do not tread on me. Have mercy on me… » « First, you must have mercy on yourself. On your soul. » « What is the soul? » « It is what makes a god of man and not an animal. Vice and sin kill it, and once it is killed, man becomes a repulsive animal. » « Will it be possible for me to see You again? » « Who looks for Me, finds Me. » « Where do You live? » « Where hearts need doctors and medicines to become honest again. » « In that case… I will not see You again… I live where no doctor, medicine or honesty is wanted. » « Nothing prevents you from coming to where I am. My name will be shouted in the streets and will reach you. Goodbye. » « Goodbye, my Lord. Allow me to call You “Jesus”. Oh! Not out of familiarity! … But that a little of salvation may come to me. I am Aglae, remember me. » « I will. Goodbye. » The woman stays at the end of the garden, Jesus comes out of it severe. He looks at everybody. He sees perplexity in His disciples and hears jeers from the Hebronites. A servant closes the door. Jesus goes straight along the road. He knocks at the synagogue. A resentful old man looks out. He does not even give Jesus time to speak. « The synagogue is forbidden, in this holy place, to those who deal with prostitutes. Go away. » Jesus turns away without replying and continues walking along the road. His 77. Jesus at Hebron. Zacharias' House. Aglae. 244 disciples follow Him. They begin to speak when they are outside Hebron. « You asked for trouble, Master » says Judas. « A prostitute, of all people! » « Judas, I solemnly tell you that she will surpass you. And now, since you are reproaching Me, what do you say of the Judaeans? In the most holy places in Judaea we have been scoffed at and driven away… That is the truth. The day will come when Samaria and the Gentiles will worship the true God, and the people of the Lord will be soiled with blood and a crime… a crime in comparison with which the sins of prostitutes who sell their bodies and their souls, will be a very small thing. I was not able to pray on the tomb of My cousins and of the just Samuel. It does not matter. Rest, holy bones, rejoice, souls, that dwelt in them. The first resurrection is near. Then the day will come when you will be shown to the angels as the souls of the servants of the Lord. » Jesus stops speaking and the vision ends.

76. Jesus at Juttah with the Shepherd Isaac

 76. Jesus at Juttah with the Shepherd Isaac. 12th January 1945. A fresh valley resounding with the water of a silvery little torrent flowing foamy southwards among the rocks. The gay freshness of the water spreads out on the little pastures on the banks, but its moisture seems to climb up the very green slopes of the hills. It is a beautiful, varied, emerald green, which from the soil through the bushes and shrubs of the brushwood reaches up to the top of the tall trees of the wood. Many of them are walnut trees. The wood is spotted with many green open spaces, covered with thick grass, which are good, healthy pastures for herds. Jesus is going down towards the torrent with His disciples and the three shepherds. He stops patiently to wait for a sheep which has been left behind or when one of the shepherds has to run after a lamb which has gone astray. He is the Good Shepherd now. He has provided Himself with a long branch to push aside blackberry, hawthorn and clematis branches, which stick out in all directions, and catch garments. And the stick completes His pastoral figure. « See? Juttah is up there. We will cross the torrent, there is a ford, which is very useful in summer, without having to use the bridge. It would have been quicker to come via Hebron. But You did not want that. » « No. We will go to Hebron later. We must always go first to those who suffer. The dead do not suffer any longer when they have been just people. And Samuel was a just man. And if the dead need our prayers, it is not necessary to be near their bones to pray for them. Bones? What are they? A proof of the power of God Who made man with dust. But nothing else. Also animals have bones. But the skeletons of all animals are not so perfect as a man's skeleton. Only man, the king of creation, has an upright position, as a king over his subjects, and his face looks forwards and upwards without having to twist his neck; man looks upwards, towards the Abode of the Father. But they are still bones. Dust which will return to dust. The eternal Bounty has decided to assemble them again on the eternal Day to give even a greater joy to the blessed souls. Just imagine: not the souls only will be reunited and will love one another as and even more than they did on the earth, but they will rejoice also seeing one another with the same features they had on the earth: dear curly-haired children, like yours, Elias, fathers and mothers with loving hearts and faces like yours Levi and Joseph. Nay, in your case Joseph, it will be the day when at last you will see the faces for which you feel nostalgia. There are no more orphans, no widows among the just, up there… Prayers for the dead can be said anywhere. It is the prayer of a soul for the soul of a relative to the Perfect Spirit, Who is God, Who is everywhere. Oh! holy freedom of what is spiritual! There are no distances, no exile, no prisons, no tombs… There is nothing that can divide or restrict in painful impotence what is outside and above the chains of the flesh. You will go with your better part, towards your beloved ones. And they will come to you with their better part. And the whole effusion of loving souls will rotate around the Eternal Fulcrum, around God: the Most Perfect Spirit, the Creator of everything that was, is and will be, Love that loves you and teaches you how to love… But here we are at the ford. I can see a row of stones emerging from the shallow water. » « Yes, Master, it is that one there. At the time of floods it is a roaring waterfall, now there are seven streamlets flowing placidly between the six large stones of the ford. » In fact six large stones, cut quite squarely, are laid across the torrent, at about a foot from each other and the water, which before them is like a large sparkling 76. Jesus at Juttah with the Shepherd Isaac. 236 ribbon, is divided into seven minor ones, rushing happily to join together again beyond the ford, forming one only fresh stream which flows, babbling among the stones. The shepherds watch the sheep crossing, some walk on the stones, some prefer crossing in the stream, only a foot deep, and they drink the pure gurgling water. Jesus crosses on the stones followed by His disciples. They resume walking on the other bank. « You told me that You want to inform Isaac that You are here, but You do not want to go into the village? » « Yes, that is what I want. » « Well, we had better part. I will go to him, Levi and Joseph will stay with the herd and with You. I'll go up here. It will be quicker. » And Elias starts climbing up the mountain side, towards the white houses which are so bright up there in the sunshine. I seem to be following him. He is now at the first houses. He goes along a tiny path between houses and kitchen gardens. He walks thus for about ten meters. He then turns into a wider road and then enters the square. I forgot to mention that this is happening in the early morning hours. I am saying so now because the market is still on in the square and housewives and vendors are shouting under the shady trees of the square. Elias goes resolutely to the point where the square ends and quite an attractive street starts. Perhaps the nicest in the village. At the comer there is a little house, or rather, a room with the door wide open. Almost on the threshold there is a little bed, on which an emaciated sick man is lying, asking all passers-by for alms, in a plaintive voice. Elias dashes in. « Isaac… it's me. » « You? I was not expecting you. You were here last month. » « Isaac… Isaac… Do you know why I have come? » « No, I don't… You are excited. What's happening? » « I have seen Jesus of Nazareth, He is a man, now, a rabbi. He came looking for me… and He wants to see us. Oh! Isaac! Are you not well? » Isaac, in fact, has fallen back as if he were dying. But he comes round: « No. The news… Where is He? What is He like? Oh! If I could see Him! » « He is down in the valley. He sent me to say to you exactly this: “Come, Isaac, because I want to see you and bless you.” I'll call someone now to help me and I'll take you down. » « Is that what He said? » « Yes, it is. But what are you doing? » « I'm going. » Isaac throws away the blankets, he moves his paralyzed legs, he throws them off the straw mattress, he puts his feet on the floor, he stands up, still somewhat hesitating, and shaky. It all happens in an instant, under Elias' wide open eyes… who at last understands and begins to shout… A little woman looks in curiously. She sees the sick man stand up and cover himself with one of the blankets, since he has nothing else, and run away, shouting like a mad man. « Let us go… this way, it will be quicker and we will not meet the crowd… Quick, Elias. » They run through a little door of a kitchen garden in the back, they push the gate, made of dry branches, and once outside, they run along a narrow dirty path, then down a little road along kitchen gardens and finally through meadows and thickets, right down to the torrent. « There is Jesus, over there » says Elias, pointing at Him. « The tall, handsome one, with fair hair, with a white tunic and red mantle… » Isaac runs, he cuts through the grazing sheep, and with a cry of triumph, joy and adoration he prostrates himself at Jesus' feet. « Stand up, Isaac. I have come. To bring you peace and blessings. Stand up, that I may see your face. » But Isaac cannot stand up. Too much excitement at the one time and he remains prostrated, with his face on the ground, crying happily. « You came at once. You did not worry whether you could… » « You told me to come… and I came. » « He did not even close the door or pick up the alms, Master. » 76. Jesus at Juttah with the Shepherd Isaac. 237 « It does not matter. The angels will watch his house. Are you happy, Isaac? » « Oh! My Lord! » « Call Me Master. » « Yes, my Lord, my Master. Even if you had not cured me, I would have been happy to see You. How could I find so much grace with You? » « Because of your faith and patience, Isaac. I know how much you suffered… » « Nothing! nothing! It does not matter! I have found You. You are alive. You are here. That's what matters. The rest, all the rest is over. But, my Lord and my Master, You are not going away any more, is that right? » « Isaac, I have the whole of Israel to evangelize. I am going… But if I cannot stay, you can always serve and follow Me. Do you want to be My disciple, Isaac? » « Oh! But I am not capable! » « Can you avow Who I am? Avow it against jeers and threats? And tell people that I called you and you came? » « Even if You did not want, I would avow all that. I would disobey You in that, Master. Forgive me for saying so. » Jesus smiles. « You can see then that you are capable of becoming a disciple! » « Oh! If that's all one has to do! I thought it was more difficult, that we had to go to school with the rabbis to learn how to serve You, the Rabbi of rabbis… and to go to school at my age… » The man in fact must be at least fifty years old. « You have done your schooling already, Isaac. » « Me? No. » « Yes, you have. Have you not continued to believe and love, to respect and bless God and your neighbor, not to be envious, not to wish what belongs to other people, and even what was your own and you no longer possessed, to speak only the truth, even if it should be harmful to you, not to associate with Satan committing sins? Have you not done all these things, in the last thirty years of misfortunes? » « Yes, Master. » « So you see, you have done your schooling. Go on doing so and reveal, in addition, to the world, that I am in the world. There is nothing else to be done. » « I have already preached You, Lord Jesus. I preached You to the children, who used to come, when I arrived lame in this village, begging for bread and doing some work, such as shearing and dairy work, and the children used to come round my bed, when I got worse and I was paralyzed from my waist downwards. I spoke of You to the children of many years ago, and to the children of present times, who are the sons of the previous ones… Children are good and they always believe… I told them of Your birth… of the angels… of the Star and the Wise Men… and of Your Mother… Oh! Tell me! Is She alive? » « She is alive and She sends you Her regards. She always spoke of you all. » « Oh! If I could see Her! » « You will see Her. You will come to My house one day. Mary will greet you saying: “My friend”. » « Mary… yes, when you utter that name it is like filling your mouth with honey… There is a woman in Juttah, she is a woman now, she had her fourth child not long ago, but once she was a little girl, one of my little friends… and she called her children: Mary and Joseph the first two, and as she dared not call the third one Jesus, she called him Immanuel, as a good omen for herself, her home and Israel. And she is now thinking of the name to be given to her fourth child, born six days ago. Oh! When she hears that I am cured! And that You are here! Sarah is as good as home made bread, and her husband Joachim is also so good. And their relatives? I owe them my life. They have always helped and sheltered me. » « Let us go and ask them for hospitality during the hottest hours of the day and to bless them for their charity. » « This way, Master. It is easier for the sheep and we will avoid the people, who are most certainly excited. The old woman, who saw me getting up, will have certainly told them. » They follow the torrent, then further south, they depart from it, and take to a 76. Jesus at Juttah with the Shepherd Isaac. 238 steep path, following a prominence of the mountain shaped like the prow of a ship. Now the torrent flows in the opposite direction to that of those who are climbing. The water runs along a beautiful uneven valley formed by the intersection of two ranges of mountains. I recognize the place. It is unmistakable. It is the scene of the vision of Jesus and the children, which I saw last spring. The usual little dry-stone wall marks the boundaries of the estate, which declines towards the valley. I see the meadow with apple-trees, figtrees, walnut-trees, then the white house surrounded by green lawns, with the protruding wing which protects the staircase and forms a porch and loggia. And there is the little dome on the highest part, the kitchen garden with the well, the pergola and the flower beds… One can hear a lot of shouting from the house. Isaac walks in front of them all. He goes in. He calls at the top of his voice: « Mary, Joseph, Immanuel! Where are you? Come to Jesus. » Three little ones run: a girl about five years old, and two little boys, about four and two years of age, the latter still somewhat uncertain when walking. They are dumbfounded when they see the… revived man. Then the little girl shouts: « Isaac! Mummy! Isaac is here! Judith was right. » A woman comes out of a room, where there is a lot of noisy shouting: the buxom, brown, tall, lovely mother of the past vision, most beautiful in her best dress: a snow-white linen dress, like a rich chemise falling in puckers down to her ankles, tied at her well-shaped waist by a multicolored striped shawl, that covers her wonderful hips dropping in fringes down to her knees at the back, while at the front it is tied under the filigree buckle and its ends are hanging loose. A light veil patterned with rose branches on a beige background is pinned to her black plaits, like a tiny turban, and falls on to her neck in flowing folds and then onto her shoulders and breasts. It is held tight on her head by a small crown of medals tied together by a little chain. Heavy rings hang from her ears, and her tunic is held close to her neck by a silver necklace which passes through eyelets of her dress. She wears heavy silver bracelets on her arms. « Isaac! What's this? Judith… I thought she had gone mad… But you are walking! What happened? » « The Savior! Oh! Sarah! He is here! He has come! » « Who? Jesus of Nazareth? Where is He? » « Over there! Behind the walnut-tree, and He wishes to know if you will receive Him! » « Joachim! Mother! Come here, all of you! The Messiah is here! » Women, men, boys, little ones run out shouting and yelling… but when they see Jesus, tall and stately, they lose heart and become petrified. « Peace to this house and to you all. The peace and blessing of God. » Jesus walks slowly, smiling, towards the group. « My friends: will you give hospitality to the Wayfarer? » and He smiles even more. His smile overcomes all fears. The husband takes heart: « Come in, Messiah. We have loved You before meeting You. We shall love You more after meeting You. The house is celebrating today for three reasons: for You, for Isaac and for the circumcision of my third son. Bless him, Master. Woman, bring the baby! Come in, my Lord. » They go into a room decorated for the feast. There are tables with foodstuffs, carpets and branches everywhere. Sarah comes back with a lovely new-born baby in her arms. She presents him to Jesus. « May God be always with him. What is his name? » « No name yet. This is Mary, this is Joseph, this is Immanuel… but this one has no name yet… » Jesus looks at the parents, who are close to each other, He smiles: « Find a name, if he is to be circumcised today… » They look at each other, they look at Him, they open their mouths and close them again without saying anything. Everyone is paying attention. Jesus insists: « The history of Israel has so many great, sweet, blessed names. The sweetest and most blessed ones have already been given. But perhaps there are still some left. » The parents cry out together: « Yours, Lord! » and the mother adds: « But it is too holy… » Jesus smiles and asks: « When will he be circumcised? » « We are waiting for the circumciser. » « I will be present at the ceremony. And in the meantime I wish to thank you for 76. Jesus at Juttah with the Shepherd Isaac. 239 what you have done for My Isaac. He no longer needs the help of good people. But good people still need God. You called your third son: God be with us. But you had God with you ever since you were charitable to My servant. May you be blessed. Your charity will be remembered in Heaven and on the earth. » « Is Isaac going away now? Is he leaving us? » « Is that upsetting you? But he must serve his Master. But he will come, and so will I. In the meantime, you will speak of the Messiah… There is so much to be said to convince the world! But here is the person you are expecting. » A pompous personage comes in with a servant. There are greetings and low bows. « Where is the child? » he asks with haughtiness. « He is here. But greet the Messiah. He is here. » « The Messiah! The one who cured Isaac? I heard about it. But.. We will talk about it after. I am in a great hurry. The child and his name. » The people present are mortified by the man's manners. But Jesus smiles as if the impoliteness was not addressed to Him. He takes the baby, He touches his little forehead with His beautiful fingers, as if He wanted to consecrate him and says: « His name is Jesai » and He hands him back to his father, who goes into another room with the haughty man and other people. Jesus remains where He was until they come back with the child, who is screaming desperately. « Woman, give Me the child. He will not cry any longer » He says to comfort the distressed mother. In fact, the child, once he is laid on Jesus' knees, is silent. Jesus forms a group of His own, with the little ones around Him, and also the shepherds and disciples. The sheep that Elias has put in an enclosure are bleating outside. There is the noise of a party in the house. They bring sweets and drinks to Jesus. But Jesus hands them out to the little ones. « Are You not drinking, Master? Will You not have anything. We are offering it warmly. » « I know, Joachim, and I accept wholeheartedly. But let Me make the little ones happy first. They are My joy… » « Pay no attention to that man, Master. » « No, Isaac. I will pray that he may see the Light. John, take the two little boys to see the sheep. And you, Mary, come closer to Me and tell Me: Who am I? » « You are Jesus, the Son of Mary of Nazareth, born in Bethlehem. Isaac saw You and he gave me the name of Your Mother, that I may be good. » « To imitate Her, you must be as good as an angel of God, purer than a lily that blooms on top of a mountain, as pious as the holiest Levite. Will you be like that? » « Yes, Jesus, I will. » « Say: Master or Lord, little girl. » « Let her call Me with My name, Judas. Only when it is uttered by innocent lips, it does not lose the sound that it has on My Mother's lips. Everybody, throughout future centuries, will mention that name, some because of an interest or other, some to curse it. Only innocent people, without any interest and any hatred, will pronounce it with the same love as this little girl and My Mother. Also sinners will invoke Me, because they need mercy. But My Mother and the little ones! Why do you call Me Jesus? » He asks, caressing the little girl. « Because I love You… as I love my father, mother and my little brothers » she says, embracing Jesus' knees, and smiling with her head turned upwards. And Jesus bends down and kisses her… and it all ends thus.